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Press Release | TASC Report Shows That One-Parent Families Have Least Wealth in Ireland

Press Release

One-Parent Families have by far the least wealth in Ireland

TASC report 2015 ‘The Distribution of Wealth in Ireland Today’

www.onefamily.ie

(Dublin, Wednesday 9th December 2015) One Family – Ireland’s organisation for people parenting alone and sharing parenting – reacts to the report released today by TASC on the distribution of wealth in Ireland.

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO, comments: “Today’s TASC report shows that those with the lowest levels of wealth in Ireland are one-parent families. We at One Family witness the impact this has on the families we work with on a day to day basis. Parents are struggling to keep their heads above water and are becoming increasingly isolated as the gap between those who have and haven’t increases. The report shows that the average household has a net worth seven times greater than the average for a single parent household.”

Kiernan continues: “The report also show that more than half of all single parents have less than €300 in savings, compared to €4,000 for single person households. This puts these families in a precarious position should any unforeseen expenses arise. Our next Government must prioritise the dangerously high levels of poverty experienced by many children and parents living in one-parent families.”

The TASC report details the facts that one-parent families are:

  • Less likely to own their own home and face significant barriers to owning property.
  • Have business assets at 1/5 of the average rate of people in Ireland.
  • Have savings of €300 on average, less than 10% of others.
  • Have double the rates of debt to assets and are credit constrained at three times the rate of average households.
  • The average household has a net worth seven times greater than the average for a single parent household.
  • The average net wealth for a single parent is €30,600 which compares to an average figure of €218,700 for all households. Half of all single parents have less than €1,400 in net wealth.

A copy of the report is available here.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 as Cherish and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families and people sharing parenting or separating, offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those sharing parenting, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to professionals working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 66 22 12, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes Family Day and presents the Family Day Festival every May, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie. The askonefamily helpline can be contacted on lo-call 1890 66 22 12.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Hands

Press Release | One-Parent Families Experience Highest Deprivation and Poverty in Ireland – Shameful!

Press Release

One-Parent Families Experience Highest Deprivation and Poverty in Ireland – Shameful!

SILC Report 2014 Launched Today

www.onefamily.ie

(Dublin, Thursday 26th November 2015) One Family – Ireland’s organisation for people parenting alone and sharing parenting – reacts to the Survey on Income and Living Conditions (SILC) 2014 results published today, which clearly show that people parenting alone and their children remain  the poorest families in Ireland.

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO, comments: “Today’s SILC results show that those with the highest rates of deprivation at nearly 60% are one-parent families. This is combined in the 2014 results with the fact that the most common type of family living in consistent poverty are also people parenting alone. This is a direct result of government choices and policies and it is unacceptable to continue to sentence a generation of children to a lifetime of poverty and poor life chances.”

Kiernan continues: “People parenting alone tell us through our monthly surveys, askonefamily helpline and our family support services that they constantly live on the knife edge of poverty. Government continues to enforce ill-formed activation measures without the provision of effective supports such the long-promised, affordable quality childcare.”

One Family recorded a staggering 30% increase of callers to its askonefamily helpline in 2014. The real impact of years of austerity is only now being realised and one-parent families and parents sharing parenting of their children have borne the brunt of spending cuts. Every parent should have an equal opportunity to create a better future for his or her children. All families deserve an equal chance.

Research shows that a key contributor to children’s futures is not the structure of their families but living in consistent poverty.  One in four families in Ireland is a one-parent family and 58% of lone parents are employed. Only 45,000 lone parents are now in receipt of the One-Parent Family Payment. They want to work and they want to learn. The policies of activation being directed towards these families are not working. Children in one-parent families are still more than twice as likely to live in poverty. The number of children in Ireland living in consistent poverty – meaning they are living both at risk of poverty and experiencing deprivation – has risen to nearly 12%; while 23% of children in a one-parent family experience deprivation.

The askonefamily helpline can be contacted on lo-call 1890 66 22 12.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 as Cherish and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families and people sharing parenting or separating, offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those sharing parenting, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to professionals working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 66 22 12, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes Family Day and presents the Family Day Festival every May, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Further Information/Scheduling

Shirley Chance, Director of Communications | t: 01 664 0124 / e: schance@onefamily.ie

Policy | At the Centre of Social Welfare Change

One Family Director of Policy & Programmes, Stuart Duffin, writes about what should be at the centre of social welfare change.

As an election looms for Spring 2016 we need to begin to raising public awareness on the issue of poverty and its effects on health. Our social welfare system is undergoing fundamental change. Reforms affecting many working lone parents are plunging many into even deeper poverty and reinforcing inequality. Restructuring is creating a system which is leaving more parents without constructive supports, whilst those who may qualify must engage with a system which lacks compassion and fails to treat them with dignity and respect.

The Government’s approach to simplifying welfare is undermined by increasing conditionality, and the erosion of a rights based approach to entitlement. The characterisation of one-parent families as undeserving – ‘skivers’ enjoying an overly generous system or worse, actively defrauding the system at the expense of hard working taxpayers – ignores the evidence about the reality of parents’ lives. This rhetoric is used to justify the approach. Many one-parent families who are on the JobSeekers Allowance for example, are required to engage in stressful work seeking activities despite inadequate childcare provision. Parents are blamed for not being in paid work while the real barriers to employment such as the lack of jobs, lack of affordable and suitable childcare, non-family friendly practices and employer discrimination, and our low wage economy are not tackled effectively. At the same time, an immense amount of unpaid work in caring for children (most often done by women) or socially worthwhile volunteering goes unrecognised and unrewarded.

The need for a new architecture for social welfare and protection has never been more pressing.

Therefore, One Family is developing and promoting a Manifesto for Change, which includes:

  1. Parents need income security at a level where no one is left in poverty and all have sufficient income to lead a dignified life.
  2. Make respect for human rights and dignity the cornerstone of a new approach to welfare.
  3. Radically simplify the social protection system.
  4. Invest in the support needed to enable families to participate fully in society.

Our future is better when we feel secure and supported; not when we are vilified and our needs are ignored.

One Family’s Manifesto for Change will be available on this site prior to General Election 2016.

askonefamily | Budget 2016 Social Welfare Changes

askonefamily_200px Logo_Small_LRWe have summarised some of the main changes from Budget 2016 (presented on 13 October 2015) which may affect one-parent families. If you or anyone you know would like information regarding your individual circumstances, askonefamily is available on 1890 66 22 12 / 01 662 9212 or by email here.

Budget 2016 | Social Welfare Changes

  • No change to the main social welfare payment rates, which include One-Parent Family Payment, Jobseeker’s Allowance Transition and Jobseeker’s Allowance, so it remains at €188 a week for the adult and €29.80 per week, per child.
  • The earnings disregard of €90 a week, which applies to One-Parent Family Payment, will now also apply to Jobseeker’s Allowance Transition. Earnings over €90 will be assessed at 50% rather than the previous 60%. This will apply from January 2016.
  • Fuel Allowance will increase from 1st January 2016 to €22.50 a week, up from €20.
  • Family Income Supplement net income thresholds will increase between €5 and €10 a week, also from January 2016:
Family size 2015 rates 2016 rates
1 child €506 €511
2 children €602 €612
3 children €703 €713
4 children €824 €834
5 children €950 €960
  • Child Benefit will increase by €5 a month, from January 2016
  • The Christmas bonus will be paid in December 2015 to long-term social welfare recipients at a rate of 75% of their payment; this includes those on One-Parent Family Payment, Jobseeker’s Allowance transition, Carer’s Allowance, Disability Allowance, Widow/Widower’s/Surviving Civil Partner’s Pensions.
  • It will also be paid to those on Back to Work Allowance, Community Employment, Rural Social Scheme, Tús, Gateway and Jobs Initiative.
  • There will be 2 week Paternity Benefit, in respect of births from September 2016.
  • Those on Carer’s Allowance who have been in receipt of the Respite Care Grant will receive an increase in the payment, to €1,700 and it will be called the Carer’s Support Grant.

The information above can be downloaded here.

Press Release | Budget 2016 Let Down for Poor One-Parent Families; Child Benefit Disappointing, Income Disregard Welcome

Press Release

Budget 2016 a Let Down for Poor One-Parent Families

Child Benefit Disappointing, Income Disregard Welcome

www.onefamily.ie

(Dublin, Tuesday 13 October 2015) One Family, Ireland’s organisation for people parenting alone, sharing parenting and separating, today responds to Budget 2016 acknowledging that Government listened to us and the parents we support by providing a modest increase in a parent’s ability to stay in low paid employment by increasing the income disregard of those on JobSeekers Transition Allowance (JSTA). However a Child Benefit giveaway to everyone is unstrategic and does not address the children pushed into poverty by this Government. This approach does not fit with the Government’s self proclaimed family-friendly Budget for 2016.

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO explains: “This Government has heaped cuts on those one-parent families who rely on social welfare in the past four Budgets. Child poverty rates have rocketed, particularly in one-parent families and some social welfare reforms have run contrary to Government policy. Therefore equalising the amount someone can earn whilst on the JSTA is just common sense in supporting people to move off welfare and into sustainable employment. However welcome this tweak is, much more needs to be done to provide a package of supports to help parents work and we haven’t yet seen any sign of that.

“It is not good enough that some families are supported more than others, if Government really wants to be family-friendly to all families then more needs to be done to be aware of the reality of the diversity of families in Ireland what they need.”

Stuart Duffin, One Family Director of Policy & Programmes, states: “Government has not listened to the calls of many organisations in the voluntary sector to target resources at the poorest children in Ireland rather than giving a pre-election €5 to everyone on Child Benefit. What low-income working families need is the Family Income Supplement adjusted so that it makes work pay by reducing the qualifying hours to 15 hours per week and tapering the payment; as well as recognising the value and costs of shared parenting by providing the Single Person Child Carer Tax Credit to each parent.  It seems also to have ignored recommendations put forward by the OECD and ESRI in their recent reports showing that parents continue to have higher jobless rates than others. We know that Government has seen the evidence. It is, shockingly, yet to be seen to effectively act on it continuing not to invest the required levels in childcare and afterschool care.”

Government should be doing everything it can to help poor children, but Budget 2016 lets families down again. One Family calls on Government to respond to the lived realities of one-parent families and get it right.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 062 2023

Press Release | Budget 2016 could finally get it right for the poorest of Ireland’s children. But will Government deliver on Tuesday?

Press Release

Budget 2016 could finally get it right for the poorest of Ireland’s children.

But will Government deliver for families on Tuesday?

(Dublin, Friday 9 October 2015) One Family, Ireland’s organisation for people parenting alone, sharing parenting and separating, outlines in its pre-Budget 2016 submission ways that Government could finally get it right for people parenting alone and their children. But with levels of child poverty in Ireland increasing dramatically, and one-parent families statistically those at higher risk of deprivation and homelessness, will Government take this opportunity to make good on its promises by reducing the barriers to accessing education and employment; or will it target one-parent families again?

Yesterday Taoiseach Enda Kenny told the Dublin Chamber of Commerce that he “will prioritise measures that boost jobs and break that cycle of joblessness and poverty” in the upcoming Budget and beyond. One Family asks if he will deliver on this promise, and reiterates its recommendations for Budget 2016 which would provide a social and economic future for one-parent families based on investment and opportunity.

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO, states: “We are stating clearly again that Government must invest in Budget 2016 in a coherent package of supports and services for parents moved off the One-Parent Family Payment and to Job Seeker’s Allowances if it is serious about supporting lone parents into sustainable employment and out of social welfare; particularly after a series of cuts targeting one-parent families since Budget 2011. Without this, the Department of Social Protection’s current reform process will continue to fail and families will continue to suffer.”

Stuart Duffin, One Family Director of Policy & Programmes, comments: “We have been highlighting the need for quality, affordable childcare and out of school care; access to quality and assured housing; and family-friendly employment opportunities, which require significant government investment and cross-departmental collaborations. One Family’s recommendations for Budget 2016 are simple, low cost and cost effective and designed to make a real difference in increasing positive outcomes for many thousands of children.”

A package of supports for OFP recipients being transitioned must include:

  • The Income Disregard to remain at €90 for all OPFs regardless of their payment.
  • Equal access to all activation measures and in particular MOMENTUM.
  • Access to free fees for part-time education options.
  • Allow JSTA CE participants to have an additional payment of €50/week equalising it with JobBridge in recognition of family costs.
  • Provide specialist bridging programmes for lone parents such as New Futures and New Steps.
  • Raise the Qualified Child Increase to help reduce child poverty by tailoring it to the poorest families.
  • Recognise the value and costs of shared parenting by providing the Single Person Child Carer Tax Credit to each parent.
  • Adjust the Family Income Supplement so that it makes work pay for lone parents by reducing the qualifying hours to 15 hours per week and taper payment.
  • Provide a high quality accessible Childcare and Out Of School Care system.

/Ends.

NOTES FOR EDITORS

In addition to the introduction of reform of the One-Parent Family Payment which is resulting in increased poverty for many working lone parents, previous cuts that have targeted One-Parent Family Payment recipients and one-parent families since Budget 2011 include:

  • Budget 2014
  1. The One Parent Family Tax Credit was discontinued and replaced with the Single Person Child Carer Credit, which only one parent can claim, whereas the previous credit could be claimed by both parents sharing parenting.
  2. Maternity Benefit was standardised at €230, an increase for some but a decrease of €32 for others.
  3. The FÁS training allowance was discontinued for those in receipt of some social welfare payments, including those receiving One Parent Family Payment.
  • Budget 2013
  1. Child Benefit was reduced from €140 per child to €130 (for 1st, 2nd and 3rd child) in Budget 2013.
  2. Back to School Clothing & Footwear Allowance (BTSCFA): Reduced from €250 to €200 for children aged 12+, and from €150 down to €100 for 4-11 year olds.
  3. Cost of Education Allowance (paid with Back to Education Allowance, BTEA) cut completely from €300 down to €0 for all new and existing BTEA recipients.
  • Budget 2012
  1. BTSCFA, from €305 reduced to €250 for 12+, and from €200 down to €150 for 4-11 yr olds; age eligibility also increased from 2 to 4 year olds in 2012.
  2. Ongoing cuts to OFP include Income Disregard cut from €146.50 down to €90.
  3. The half rate transition payment of OFP was cut for those who were going into work and stopping payment.
  4. OFP recipients lost access to half rate payment for Illness Benefit and Jobseeker’s Benefit, where applicable.
  5. Fuel Allowance was reduced from 32 weeks to 26 weeks.
  6. Cost of Education Allowance (for BTEA recipients) reduced from €500 to €300.
  7. CE Scheme participants, many of whom were lone parents, had their training and materials grant cut from €1,500 to €500; and new CE participants from 2012 could not get ‘double’ payment, just €20 extra allowance.
  • Budget 2011
  1. Cuts included the main rate of social welfare payments reduced from €196 down to €188.
  2. Child Benefit was reduced by €10 for 1st and 2nd child / €150 to €140; 3rd child / €187 to €167; 4th and subsequent child / reduced to €177.
  3. Christmas Bonus was discontinued (half-rate partial reinstatement for some last year).

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 as Cherish and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families and people sharing parenting or separating, offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those sharing parenting, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to professionals working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 66 22 12, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes Family Day and presents the Family Day Festival every May, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 062 2023

 

Starting Over

Parenting | 10 Ways to Starting Over

Starting OverRelationships can become very negative within families. This is often due to the many layers of challenges parents are faced with on a daily basis. At times we wonder what we got ourselves into and how we are going to cope.

It is never too late to review your relationships and make positive changes. If you feel you have become weighed down by the stress of life and that your parenting has moved into a place you had never expected it to be, then maybe it is time to think about a fresh start.

The following tips may support you to make changes to your parent-child relationships and aid you in the process of starting over:

  1. Think about what life use to be like. What did you like about parenting in the early days? What type of relationship did you dream you would have with your child? Was there ever a time that you felt you had a very positive relationship with your child? It is possible to regain that bond.
  2. Now think about what went wrong. What is stopping you from parenting in a way you would like to? What do you children need from you that you find you can’t give?
  3. Start by improving your relationship with yourself. What needs do you have? Can you identify your needs and explore how you can get them met. Self care is the key to a positive relationship with others. Think about what you are good at when it comes to parenting. Are you organised? A good planner? Do you stick to routines? Are you good at cooking, helping with homework? How patient are you? Can you tell or read stories? Do you enjoy playing games?
  4. Choose one thing you are good at- there is at least one – use this as a base to start a new relationship with your child. If, for example, you are good at telling stories why not start a weekly library trip? Focus on this one hour with your child each week. Encourage them to enjoy books. Find books and stories that interest you both. If you can have this one hour a week with your child that you both enjoy, it will support a positive feeling that you can build upon.
  5. Make a list of what you admire about your child. Try to wear rose coloured glasses for a week and only focus on what your child does well. Praise them when you see them do nice things, even if they are small. Focus on encouraging them and admiring them. At times all our energy goes into what our children do to upset us. Children generally don’t wake up with a plan to upset and annoy their parents. If we can focus on the positives and train ourselves to spend 70% of your energy on the positives you will see dramatic changes in your relationship with your child.
  6. Explore the issues that really challenge you in parenting your child and yourself. Pick one and look at what you can do to change things. If, for example, you find your child is not listening, think about how good you listen. Explore what stops you from listening. Sit with your child and name the issue – stick to one – and name how you feel about it. Ask your child how they feel about this issue. Together you can plan the changes to be made in the next week to acknowledge each other’s needs.
  7. Try not to blame, it takes two people to have a relationship. Own your part and support your child to make changes along with you. If your child is less than 3 years then focus on what you can do differently. When we make a change to our own behaviour it will have a ripple effect on those around us.
  8. Work on one issue at a time and introduce weekly family meetings. If your children are over 3 years old this is a very effective way to get everyone talking and communicating. Let everyone have a voice. You only have to listen. Hear what your children. Click here to read our ’10 Ways to Run a Family Meeting’.
  9. There is no purpose in blaming your children for how they behave. Children respond to the environment they live in. Hear what they say and then make a statement about what you would like to see happen. Can you have weekly dates with your children? Individual quality time is very effective and allows you focus on what each individual child enjoys. Group activities every other week are also great at bringing family together. These can just be fun things in the home, where there is calmness and room to talk.
  10. Try to focus on what you do well each day. Name one thing you do well or even partly well that day and sleep on that. In doing this, you will support yourself to make change and believe that positive change can happen.

Seek professional support if you are really struggling. Taking part in a parenting class can really help guide you and offer you support. One Family also offer one to one parent mentoring support. Do not do it alone, ask for help and achieve your dream relationship with your children.

This ’10 Ways to’ article is by One Family’s Director of Children & Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly, as part of our weekly ’10 Ways to’ series of parenting tips. You can read the full series here.

LIVE Facebook Q&A with Geraldine on this topic Monday 28 September from 11am-12pm in our NEW One Family Parenting Group which is a closed Facebook group (meaning that only members can read posts) that anyone can join. Post your questions and share your experiences.

Find out more about our parenting skills programmes and parent supports. For support and information on these or any related topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie.

Responsible Behaviour

Parenting | 10 Ways to Talk to Your Teenager About Responsible Behaviour

Responsible BehaviourMany parents dread the teenage years. Drinking alcohol, smoking, sex and many other issues come up when our children reach this age. Many of them are normal for this stage of development. At times we can worry too much about what the teenage years will bring so we ban everything, thinking if we take full control nothing can go wrong. The unfortunate thing is, you are not spending as much time with your child now, so you are not going to be able to control everything they do or everything that happens to them.

Here are some tips to help you survive the journey with your child and see them through the teenage years in a positive way:

  1. Try to not expect the worst. We hear so much from other parents and the media about what young people get up to. This is usually a smaller percentage than you would think. Try not to be afraid to hear what lies ahead for your teen. It can be a wonderful time for them and for you if you trust your skills as a parent and trust your child to make good choices.
  2. Try not to ban things. The more you say ‘no’ the more your teen will focus their energy on finding a way to get or to do whatever they want. Instead explore with your teenager how they can make good choices around what it is they need to do.
  3. Almost every teen will try alcohol, most likely between 14-17 years old. There is very little you can do to stop them from accessing alcohol if they really want to. Talk with them about your fears around what alcohol can do to a person. Talk with them about how they would cope. Who would they go to for support if they made the wrong choice? Talk with them about making responsible choices.
  4. At this age teenagers can also be in and out of many relationships. Some young people will engage in sexual behaviour before the age of 18. You can talk with them about self respect, feeling safe, saying ‘No’. Try not to back away from talking with your teen about contraception. Make a GP appointment for girls especially and help them get information about their options. Introduce your teen to literature around relationships. By supporting your teen to be armed with the correct information you will be supporting them to make the right choices. Just because you give them this information does not mean you are giving them permission to engage in sexual relationships, but making sure that if they choose to they are doing it in a responsible way.
  5. Allow your teenager some freedom. If you can start in the very early years to give your child opportunities to make choices and act in responsible ways then as teenagers you will have some idea of what your teenager is capable of. Teenagers need space and need for you to trust them. Start from a place of trust, if they prove unable to act responsibly, then take away the freedoms and start again.
  6. Be very clear with your teenager about boundaries in the home and the community. Stick to your principles. Ensure your teen understands the boundaries and why they exist. Review them regularly as you will need to shift the boundaries as your teen grows and shows you how responsible they can be.
  7. Be fair. Listen to your teenager and hear what they have to say. Try not to do things because that is how you were parented or because you feel you are expected to parent in certain ways. Be confident in how you parent, you know your child best and you need to trust your instincts. If you really feel you are out of your depth seek professional support. Call the askonefamily helpline on 1890 662 212
  8. Try to be not too strict with teens. Allow them downtime. Do they really need to get up by 10am at the weekends? Why not get a piercing? What about it if they wear to much make up or dye their hair? Choose your battles wisely and be open to hearing their views. Explore the issue for yourself. Educate yourself about Facebook and other social media. Share your views with teens and try to reach agreement with them.
  9. Although you are asked to be open to the challenges of the teenage years you must also be very clear about what you expect from your teen. Follow through and do not change the rules to suit you. Deal with issues when they arise and try not to imagine every wrong choice your teen will make. Making mistakes is part of growing up, making them in the safety of your family and home are what you want. You can then be there to offer support.
  10. Try not to criticise your teen. They are trying their best. Life can be hard for them too. Do not belittle the challenges they face. Although they are very near to adulthood they are still children so allow them these years to explore, learn and understand the type of person they are and want to become.

This ’10 Ways to’ article is by One Family’s Director of Children & Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly, as part of our weekly ’10 Ways to’ series of parenting tips. You can read the full series here.

LIVE Facebook Q&A with Geraldine on this topic Thursday 24 September from 5pm-6pm in our NEW One Family Parenting Group which is a closed Facebook group (meaning that only members can read posts) that anyone can join. Post your questions and share your experiences.

Find out more about our parenting skills programmes and parent supports. For support and information on these or any related topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie.

Parenting | 10 Ways to Settle Back into the School Routine

back to school Settling back into the school routine can be very challenging. When you are parenting school age children, the best way to make a plan is to do it together with your children. Whether is it September or another time of the year, here are some tips to support you.

  1. Call a family meeting. If you have not tried this before try not be skeptical as it can be very effective. By bringing the whole family together you are making a statement – This is our family and our issue to resolve together, which is a really good principle to parent by. If you need extra advice on how to do this, read our ’10 ways to’ run a family meeting
  2. When you have all the family in one place then make your statement – School is back on, how can we ensure a good term ahead for everyone?
  3. Ask each person to say what they need in the next term. You should expect various responses, from ‘no nagging’, to ‘not wanting homework’ to needing ‘time out with friends’. This is normal, take note of all suggestions.
  4. Once you have a list of what everyone needs, then you can start to explore if and how these needs can be met.
  5. If you have older children, maybe they can offer to help meet the needs of younger children. Such as supporting them with homework.
  6. Be sure to name your needs and be reasonable. Try to keep them very specific, e.g. “I need to know homework is done every day. “I need everyone in bed at a reasonable time.” “I need everyone to take a level of responsibility around getting ready for school in the mornings.”
  7. Agree what each person can do for themselves. “Everyone has their own alarm clock.” “Everyone makes their own sandwiches, once they are over about 7 years old. Your job is to provide the food, agree what needs to be available, but you do not have to be responsible for filling the boxes.
  8. Once you have agreed on the key principles of what everyone needs to do, allow some space and variation in how each person achieves them. If you have older children and teenagers try not to schedule every minute for them. Allow them choose when homework will be done. It is their homework. Allow them some choice around free time after school before homework starts. Allow them to choose when they eat. You can prepare dinner, but is it reasonable to expect everyone to eat at the same time? You can also agree on family time and when you schedule some time together as a family.
  9. If we try to control everything our children do, we are just setting ourselves up for failure – along with exhaustion! As parents, it is important we remember that our role is to prepare children for life. Allowing them to make choices and have some control is part of this process. If your child is never allowed to plan their own time and make reasonable choices, how will they learn? How will you know what they are capable of?
  10. Look after yourself well. In order to parent our children effectively, we must learn to parent ourselves. Take time out for you. Be creative in how you can get this time. You will have thought of many of your own needs during this process and your children are not responsible for meeting them. You need to find ways to meet them yourself. In this way you will have the patience and energy to listen, understand and engage in positive ways with your children.

This ’10 Ways to’ article is by One Family’s Director of Children & Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly, as part of our weekly ’10 Ways to’ series of parenting tips. You can read the full series here.

Next you might like to read: 10 Ways to manage Homework With Primary School Children 

LIVE Facebook Q&A with Geraldine on this topic Monday 7 September from 11am-12pm in our NEW One Family Parenting Group which is a closed Facebook group (meaning that only members can read posts) that anyone can join. Post your questions and share your experiences.

Find out more about our parenting skills programmes and parent supports. For support and information on these or any related topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie.

Vacancy | Communications & Marketing Officer: Part-time

An exciting new role has arisen in our Communications Service for a Communications & Marketing Officer: Part-time. Working to the Director of Communications, the purpose of this part-time role is to assist with development, consolidation and focus of the communication and marketing requirements of One Family around new technologies, whilst also engaging with traditional communications; and with production of all One Family events, including our annual Family Day Festival. One Family requires a Communications & Marketing Officer who will utilise their broad communications background and marketing experience in order to positively communicate and market One Family’s mission and services.

The closing date for applications is Wednesday 16 September 2015 at 12pm. Further details, including Job Specification, Person Specification and Application Procedure can be read here.