Press Release

Government policies push more one-parent families out of work and into poverty –

One Family Annual Review 2013

www.onefamily.ie

(Dublin, Monday 29 September 2014) One Family – Ireland’s organisation for people parenting alone and people sharing parenting – launches its Annual Review 2013 amid ongoing trends of embattled parents leaving work due to poorly thought-out government policies, lack of quality out of school care and rising accommodation costs.

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO explains: “2013 was another hard year for one-parent families in Ireland. The poorly planned policies in Budget 2012 are pushing more people parenting alone onto social welfare fulltime as they cannot afford to work, attend education or get workplace experience due to government cuts. This makes no sense and is counter-intuitive as on the one hand government is forcing people onto the live register when their youngest child is seven, whilst at the same time making it harder for them to stay connected to the labour market as the income disregard has been slashed. We know that work isn’t working for far too many families. We must move on from attacking those parenting alone to addressing real needs by helping people stay in work by increasing the income disregard in Budget 2015.”

Stuart Duffin, One Family Director of Policy & Programmes, highlights: “One Family’s Annual Review 2013 shows a 20% increase in calls to our national askonefamily helpline specifically in relation to social welfare and finance issues as parents try to make work pay, often unsuccessfully. This is because the support they get from the State is continuing to decline in real terms, the barriers to returning to or staying in work can be insurmountable for many and government policies are working against them.”

One Family’s 10 Solutions campaign addresses this as a matter of urgency. Research shows that a key contributor to children’s futures is not the structure of their families but living in consistent poverty.  Current policies mean that Ireland risks seeing more poor children becoming poor adults. This is catastrophic for their life chances and the public purse. But it is not too late to change this.

Karen continued: “We saw a massive increase in tax related queries as Budget 2014 removed the One Parent Tax Credit which is another example of the government not understanding the needs of families who share parenting of their children. The tough qualifications for rent supplement is also pushing people out of work and many families are becoming homeless – this is a matter of urgency.”

One Family’s Annual Review 2013 can be read/downloaded here. 

A short video summarising One Family’s Annual Review 2013 and 5 key demands for Budget 2015 can be viewed here.

One Family’s demands for Budget 2015 are:

1. Work must pay for low-income families.
2. Income disregard cannot be cut anymore and the minimum hours qualification for FIS eligibility should be reduced.
3. Those on the OFP must have equal access to all of the government activation measures and access to free part-time education to help them get into sustainable careers.
4. Out of School Childcare needs to be recognised and supported so that parents can access education, training and work.
5. The Single Person Child Carer Tax Credit discriminates against those sharing parenting – most often against Fathers, and is out of step with the realities of contemporary Irish family life.

One Family’s full Budget Submission can be read here.

Lone parents are being forced out of employment.  The ongoing reduction of the income disregard – the amount a lone parent in receipt of the One-Parent Family Payment can earn without a reduction in supports as they transition into employment – from €146.50 to €60 per week is working against Government policy. This reduction means that it is no longer financially viable for many to work which is the opposite of what Government claimed to set out to do – support lone parents into employment.  Although 53% of lone parents are in the labour force, one-parent families remain those statistically most at risk of poverty.  This cannot be justified.

/Ends.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 as Cherish and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those sharing parenting, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to professionals working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 62 22 12, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes Family Day and presents the Family Day Festival every May, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 062 2023

Today we launch our Annual Review 2013. Throughout the year, we offered 3,611 individual service offerings and 2,474 in-person service interactions; an increase on the previous year of 9%.

Also today, we reiterate our demands for Budget 2015 (our full Pre-Budget Submission can be read here) which is scheduled to be announced on Tuesday 14 October.

This short video features our CEO Karen Kiernan who summarises our Annual Review, and our Director of Policy & Programmes Stuart Duffin, who states our five key Budget demands to Government.

Problems are a normal part of life. Many families face situations in life that, despite our best efforts, we simply can’t ‘fix’.  Often there are other options we can explore and developing coping skills helps us to identify what these could be. Good coping skills also help us to learn to accept those situations that are beyond our control so we can feel better and progress, even if the problem still exists. Developing coping skills in our families makes us more resilient. Children learn from what they see and enabling them to develop these skills and resources will help them in countless ways as they progress through life.

This week in our ’10 Ways to’ series we look at ways to develop coping skills within your family. Many of these suggestions are expanded upon in other ’10 Ways to’ articles which you can access by clicking on the links within the points below.

1. Do things together – eat, play, socialise – spend quality time together as much as possible to help strengthen your family’s bonds and relationships.

2. Talk and listen to each other; value the time you spend together.

3. Choose how to use your time. Prioritise what is most important, don’t stress if the little things don’t get done.

4. Show appreciation for each other. Demonstrate it with your words and actions.

5. Take care of your physical and mental needs, and those of your children. It is important to remember to look after the basics such as healthy eating, adequate sleep and social engagement.

6. Develop social supports in your community. This can seem challenging, especially if we don’t have friends or family members who live nearby, but there are many ways to increase our involvement in our communities and invest in building relationships. Get involved.

7. Actively do things which help reduce your stress levels. These can be as simple as a walk in the park, calling a friend, or focussing on taking deep, relaxing breaths.

8. Plan things; the everyday and the long term. Write out your plan, it will seem more manageable and help you to achieve your aims.

9. Don’t spend all day worrying and thinking about a problem – box it, and play with your children.

10. Seek professional supports and use them well. Many organisations offer these supports including One Family which provides a range of counselling and parenting supports focused on the needs of one-parent families, parents sharing parenting, parents experiencing separation, and their children; and those experiencing a crisis pregnancy. Our confidential lo-call askonefamily helpline is 1890 66 22 12 / support@onefamily.ie.

This week’s ’10 Ways to’ is by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

For support and advice on any of these topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie. Find out more about our parenting skills programmes here.

Press Release

One Family Welcomes Children & Family Relationships Bill as a Major Step to Recognising Family Diversity and Change in Ireland:

but to work it requires investment

(Dublin, Thursday 25 September 2014) One Family – Ireland’s organisation for one-parent families and people sharing parenting – welcomes the publication of the Children & Family Relationships Bill 2014 by Minister Frances Fitzgerald today. As an organisation with 42 years of expertise in supporting diverse families in Ireland, One Family acknowledges that this Bill is groundbreaking in recognising the complexity of family arrangements that children live in today.

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO explains: “We are pleased that the Bill will provide the ability for people who live with and care for children such as step-parents, grandparents and foster-parents to seek guardianship, as well as wider family members to seek contact time. It assists in the somewhat stressful process for some unmarried fathers in becoming guardians of their children as more will become automatic guardians. We welcome the fact that many of One Family’s recommendations were listened to and that the important section on Making Parenting Orders Work has been expanded and clarified.”

“The elucidation of the importance of the concept of the ‘best interests of the child’ and the impact of violence in a family is extremely welcome as is the ability of the Court to request reports and expert testimony on the welfare of any child. However the major problem in One Family’s experience is that there is no court welfare system in Ireland and what exists currently is unregulated and expensive. Our work in the pilot Child Contact Centres with Barnardos resulted in comprehensive family and child assessments and this is what is required in many families where they are in dispute in court. Family law courts are currently making inappropriate decisions about children resulting in unsafe or unsuitable access and custody arrangements as they have no evidence on which to base their decisions.”

The Bill recognises the importance of measures to resolve family issues outside court including tools such as mediation, counselling, the development of an agreement and parenting programmes. Also welcome is the fact that no judge, barrister or solicitor should wear a wig or gown during family law proceedings.

Karen continues: “Of major concern to us in One Family is the fact that all costs relating to court process, mediation, counselling and parenting supports seems to be borne by the parents involved in family law matters. This is not realistic for many parents who are struggling to make ends meet and government needs to invest in ancillary family support services to court which will assist this Bill in being successful in the resolution of family law disputes outside court.”

The Press Release issued this afternoon by the Department of Justice can be read here.

/Ends.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 as Cherish and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those sharing parenting, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to professionals working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 62 22 12, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes Family Day and presents the Family Day Festival every May, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Further Information/Scheduling

Shirley Chance, Director of Communications | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 414 8511

Every month a member of the One Family services team explains more about the particular supports they offer. This month, Parent Mentor Niki Williams writes about One Family mentoring supports available to all parents.

Parent Mentoring is a service where a parent can safely talk one to one with a trained professional about any concerns they may have with their family and child relationships. With sensitive guidance and practical suggestions, the mentor supports a parent to identify what is working well for their family and what could be changed.

Raising children can be a really challenging job yet most of us don’t evaluate our family relationships until a crisis forces us to. When living with a situation daily, it can be difficult to ‘see the wood for the trees’. Whether facing tantrums with toddlers, fussy eaters, children who won’t stay in their beds, unhappiness at school or a grunting teenager, it’s okay for a parent to need a listening ear and a helping hand sometimes. Parents always work hard to do their very best for their children.

A Parent Mentor will support a parent to take time to reflect and reach a new perspective on what’s happening. This is useful for any parent regardless of the age and stage of their child/ren.

I’m a Psychiatric Nurse, Counsellor, Parent Mentor and Trauma Therapist by training. I’ve also experienced challenging life events. In my experience, getting support doesn’t always mean solving the problem. It can mean maintaining a loving relationship even in the face of that problem. With increased knowledge about why parents and children behave the way they do, a more peaceful and enhanced home life can result for every member of the family.

One Family’s Parenting Mentoring service is now available in Cork, Dublin and Wicklow with additional regions being added later this year. This is a low-cost service charged on a sliding scale from €20-€60. To book, call 01 662 9212 or click here to complete a short booking form.

Next, you might like to read what One Family Counselling Support Worker, Lisa Maguire, wrote last month about our services for Young People in Care.

Press Release

Government Claims to Have Protected ‘Most Vulnerable’

yet One-Parent Families are Poorer When Working 

One Family supports today’s St Vincent De Paul report findings 

(Dublin, Monday 22 September 2014) One Family – Ireland’s organisation for one-parent families and people sharing parenting – welcomes the St  Vincent De Paul report published today which recognises that being a lone parent is one of the hardest survival situations in the State. One Family’s 42 years of experience delivering expert services to those parenting alone and sharing parenting helps to strengthen the SVP message.

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO explains: “The devastating impact of Budget 2012 means that those parenting alone have been living a financially precarious life.  Today’s child and family poverty statistics highlight the inconvenient truths for Government; that maintaining the value of social security support helps protect families with children from poverty, and that work isn’t working for far too many families. The government may claim to have protected the ‘most vulnerable’ but there are thousands of lone parents and their children living in desperate circumstances. We must move on from attacking those parenting alone to addressing real needs.”

Stuart Duffin, One Family Director of Policy & Programmes, highlights: “The stark evidence we collate on an on-going basis – from callers to our national askonefamily helpline and responses to our monthly survey – illustrate unequivocally that survival for our families in low-paid or no employment is balanced on a knife edge. This is because the support they get from the State is continuing to decline in real terms, while the barriers to returning to the workplace remain insurmountable for so many. If items such as food, social housing and childcare continue to become more expensive, these families’ overall incomes cannot keep up.”

Lone parents are being forced out of employment. One Family has heard from working lone parents who, with the changes being implemented from Budget 2012, have had a net income reduction of €200 per week. The ongoing reduction of the income disregard – the amount a lone parent in receipt of the One-Parent Family Payment can earn without a reduction in supports as they transition into employment – from €146.50 to €60 per week is working against Government policy. This reduction means that it is no longer financially viable for many to work which is the opposite of what Government claimed to set out to do – support lone parents into employment.  Although 53% of lone parents are in the labour force, one-parent families remain those statistically most at risk of poverty.  This cannot be justified.

Stuart Duffin further comments: “This isn’t just about balancing the high cost of housing, childcare and energy: it includes a family’s need to be part of society, by being able to participate in things many take for granted, such as buying a small birthday present or taking the children swimming on occasion. Government needs to square-up to in-work poverty. ”

One Family’s 10 Solutions to Government address this as a matter of urgency. Research shows that a key contributor to children’s futures is not the structure of their families but living in consistent poverty.  Current policies mean that Ireland risks seeing more poor children becoming poor adults. This is catastrophic for their life chances and the public purse.

Click here to read One Family’s monthly survey results. The St Vincent De Paul report can be read here.

One Family’s demands for Budget 2015 are:

1. Work must pay and be seen to pay.
2. The proposed parental dividend must work in conjunction with an up-rated income disregard.
3. Those parenting alone must have equal access to all of the government activation measures, such as MOMENTUM and access to free part-time education to help raise their labour market skills base.
4. Comprehensive provision and support for Out Of School Childcare and Recreation (OSCAR). Currently, the new child care provision (ASCCS) only lasts for 12 months, is not available for existing workers and does not take into account existing childcare relationships.
5. The Single Person Child Carer Tax Credit discriminates against those sharing parenting – most often against Fathers, in effect – and thus must recognise the realities of contemporary Irish family life.

/Ends.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 as Cherish and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those sharing parenting, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to professionals working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 62 22 12, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes Family Day and presents the Family Day Festival every May, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 062 2023

safefood’s excellent Childhood Obesity campaign launches into another phase today with a focus on treat foods for children. safefood is urging parents to say no to sweets, biscuits and crisps every day and to cut down on the amount of treat foods children are eating, so that a treat food becomes just that – an occasional treat, rather than an every day part of a child’s diet.

Parents can access a list of popular children’s ‘treats’ and their calorie content on the safefood website as well as video advice and top tips from health experts on healthy eating and how to be more active. You can follow the campaign on social media using the hashtag #letssayno.

You can also read, as part of One Family’s weekly series of parenting tips, our 10 Ways to Encourage Healthier Eating Habits and 10 Ways to Make the Most of the Playground.

Playgrounds are wonderfully exciting for children. As well as providing an opportunity to make friends, using playground equipment can help to build children’s dexterity, strength and confidence. Being outdoors regularly is good for both children and parents’ well-being and sharing fun at the playground also creates more opportunities to bond with your child.

Read on for this week’s instalment of our ’10 Ways to’ parenting tips series which explores how to make the most of the playground.

1. Get to know your local playground. Become familiar with the equipment and the space, and which equipment is appropriate to your child’s age and development. Help your child to get to know their limits and capacity and enable them to relax in the space.
2. Play with your child but also encourage your child to use the time to interact with other children, and you can take the opportunity to interact with other parents. Encourage social engagement. Children learn the rules of play by playing with other children. Support them in the playground to be assertive, to practice talking with children, and sharing and turn taking.
3. Watch your child. Do not use the time to read or text or browse your phone. Playgrounds are public spaces and this should be remembered at all times – be vigilant. Also, your children like to know you’re watching so you can see what they can do. They need your facial reactions to encourage and support them to keep exploring and challenging themselves.
4. Try to be conscious of potential accidents and safety aware, but don’t let it stop your child from using the space well. Bring wipes and plasters with you. Allow them to pick things up (within reason) and examine them. Let them get dirty and wet. Give them permission to do these things. The playground is not the time for showing off your child’s best style.
5. Bring a potty if they are toilet training or under 3 years. Often there are not toilets nearby but usually it is acceptable to sit on a potty in a quiet corner.
6. Bring healthy drinks and snacks and use the time well. Playground visits should not be associated with sweet treats.
7. Play with your child, laugh and explore. It’s nice to recall what it is like to be a child. Have a go on the swings and slide and laugh out loud. These are the things your child will recall as they grow. Also it’s good therapy for any parent!
8. Make play dates for the playground. It can be easier to manage children in the playground than in your home at times. Plan times to meet up with other parents but don’t use all the time to chat or you will miss out on your quality time with your child.
9. Don’t let the weather stop you going out. Often it is only adults who don’t like the rain. Children love puddles, getting wet and feeling the wind blow them along. Dress them appropriately and get out of the house every day for at least 30 minutes. You will both feel better.
10. If you don’t have a playground within easy access, be creative with whatever outdoors space you have available near home, in a park or on a green. There are so many ways to help children play. Usually once they are free from hand holding to run about, they are happy out!

This week’s ’10 Ways to’ is by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Ways to Develop Coping Skills in Your Family, and more helpful ’10 Ways’.

For support and advice on any of these topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie. Find out more about our parenting skills programmes here.

“Growing up in a single parent family or being raised by parents who are not married does not condemn children to a life of unhappiness, underachievement and delinquency. Rather than blaming parents and labelling their life circumstances as selfish choices, it is time for social policy debates to focus on how we can effectively support parents. Irrespective of family structure, we want parents to give their children the best possible start to life,” writes Jan M Nicholson, Roberta Holmes professor for the Transition to Contemporary Parenthood Program at La Trobe University, and advisory group member to the Longitudinal Study of Australian Children in The Guardian newspaper today.

‘Growing Up In Australia – the Longitudinal Study of Australian Children’ is important new research which reflects what One Family states and knows through 42 years of experience, study and campaigning: it is not the structure of a family that has most bearing on outcomes for children, but the quality of relationships in the family, the parent or parents’ background, and the impacts of consistent poverty.  In December 2013, we welcomed the launch of the report ‘Growing Up in a One-Parent Family’, a study by researchers at the University of Limerick using the ‘Growing Up in Ireland’ data, published by the Family Support Agency. A key finding of this study indicates that children from one-parent families and cohabiting families fare the same as children from married families when faced with similarly difficult conditions growing up.

‘Growing Up In Australia – the Longitudinal Study of Australian Children’ can be read/download here.

The report by the University of Limerick, ‘Growing Up in a One-Parent Family:The Influence of Family Structure on Child Outcomes’, is available to read/download here.

Press Release 

Child Payment a Start for Budget 2015 but

Lone Parents Need Support to Stay in Work

(Dublin, 15.09.2014) One Family – Ireland’s organisation for one-parent families and people sharing parenting – today welcomes the welfare to work dividend for parents returning to work provided it is combined with an income disregard for those parenting alone. This is the only way it will help to lift hard pressed one-parent families out of consistent and persistent poverty.

The key aim of Budget 2015 must be to ensure that work pays and is seen to pay. It costs a lone parent more than a couple to bring up a child because there is only one adult to make offsetting savings from their own living expenses. The reduction of the income disregard in Budget 2012 (€146.50 to €60) is working against Government policy as it means it is no longer financially viable for many one-parent families to stay in part-time employment.

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes with One Family said: “We have heard from working lone parents who, with the changes this year implemented from Budget 2012, have had a net income reduction of €200 per week and so are being forced out of employment, which is the opposite of what government set out to do, i.e. support lone parents into employment.”

Although 53% of one-parent families overall are in work, the figure for those on social welfare and working has halved to 30% over the past few years due to the slashing of the income disregard and fewer jobs. Meeting the ‘no frills’ needs of one-parent families is becoming tougher as the cost of a child rises while wages flat-line. It is a picture many hard-pressed parents will recognise.

Stuart Duffin continued: “Budget 2015 must ensure an improvement in the labour market position of parents, and in this way increase their ability to be self-sufficient and escape poverty. Cuts have been put in, they have not worked and now parents need supports. Children cost. That is why one-parent families have a higher risk of poverty than those without. The cumulative impact of low pay and cuts to family support contribute to the remarkable finding that the combined wages and benefits of a family with both parents working full time on the minimum wage are still insufficient to meet the basic needs of that family.”

NOTES FOR EDITORS:

• The Department of Social Protection states that from 1 January 2014 for those on the One Parent Family Payment, the One-Parent Family Payment (OFP) scheme’s income disregard will be reduced from its current amount of €110 per week to €90 per week for the duration of 2014.
• In Budget 2012, it was announced that there would be a gradual reduction in the amount of earnings from employment that would be ignored (disregarded) when calculating the rate of OFP paid and that this change would come in over a number of years.
• In 2012 the amount ignored was €130; in 2013 it is €110; in 2014 it will be €90; and it will decrease further to €75 in 2015 and €60 in 2016.
• From 1 January 2014, OPFP recipients can have earnings of €90 without it affecting the rate of payment of OFP and so if your earnings are greater than €90 per week, then the rate of OFP will be changed to take this new rate into account.
• By 2015, over 55,000 parents will have been moved onto the live register from the One-Parent Family Payment when their youngest child becomes 7 with no national programmes of support or engagement in place.

/Ends.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to those working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 622 212, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes Family Day and presents the Family Day Festival every May, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 062 2023

CEO of One Family, Karen Kiernan, has been appointed to the Advisory Council being established by the Minister for Children and Youth Affairs under Better Outcomes, Brighter Futures: the National Policy Framework for Children and Young People 2014-2020.

The Children’s Rights Alliance (CRA) requested nominations from its members with the appointments made by Paul Gilligan, Chair and Tom Costello, Vice Chair of the CRA with support from its Chief Executive.

The three successful nominees are:

• Karen Kiernan, Chief Executive, One Family
• Caroline O’Sullivan,  Director of Services, Irish Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children (ISPCC)
• Tanya Ward, Chief Executive, Children’s Rights Alliance

One Family looks forward to updating its members as the work of the Advisory Council progresses.

In this week’s ’10 Ways to’, our series of weekly parenting tips, we look at how to encourage children to eat more healthily. It is important for parents to instill healthy eating habits in children and, despite the fact that many children may opt for a biscuit rather than an apple if given the choice, making healthy food fun isn’t difficult to do and doesn’t have to cost a lot of money. Healthy eating for children can contribute to better energy and moods, and creates a strong foundation for their journey towards becoming healthy adults.

Try these tips:

1. Understand the food pyramid and plan the weekly menu when you are getting ready for the supermarket shop.
2. Encourage children to eat healthy food – talk with them about healthy food and what is does for our body – how it helps them play and have fun.
3. Learn some simple healthy recipes which children enjoy – freeze them and have them ready for dinners on busy days.
4. Remember it is never safe for children to go on diets or to hear about dieting. Healthy eating is the conversation to have with children.
5. Children need full fat dairy products. Do not cut healthy foods in a child’s diet. Limit sugary, processed food.
6. Encourage children to exercise – but you need to do it with them. Running in the park, playing ball, climbing hills etc. are all fun and easy ways to incorporate exercise into your and your child’s routines.
7. Limit juice drinks of all kinds. Try to stick with milk or water. Cool the water in little bottles in the fridge or use a dispenser. It makes drinking water more fun.
8. Some foods young children love and which are healthy are: fruit – introduce new fruits all the time; natural yogurt – make smoothies; wholegrain bread, avoid processed white breads; breakfast cereals – avoid high sugar ones; lean mince is a good source of iron for children and it can be used for a variety of dishes children love; pasta, eggs and baked beans. Having these foods in the cupboard will help you maintain a healthy diet for your child.
9. Be a good role model. Reflect on what diet you have and your eating habits. Children do what they see, not what you say.
10. When it’s party time, try to have lot of fruit, funky healthy sandwiches cut in different shapes, smoothies and milk shakes, pasta salads or Bolognese for the main dish, homemade pizza – children don’t need an over dose of sugary foods just because there is a celebration.

This week’s ’10 Ways to’ is by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Ways to Develop Coping Skills in Your Family and 10 Ways to Make the Most of the Playground.

For support and advice on any of these topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie. Find out more about our parenting skills programmes here.

One Family made a submission to the Commission for Energy Regulation (CER) and Irish Water regarding affordability and allowances, and highlighted the issue of allocating children’s water allowances when people are sharing parenting equally. The proposed children(s) allowance(s) and charging suggests that these allowance(s) are allocated to the recipient of the children’s allowance which is provided for by the Department of Social Protection. This, in effect, in most cases is the mother which does not recognise the dynamics of the Irish modern family and reflect that children may spend significant time in the separate homes of their mothers and fathers.

Just and fair recognition must be given to the dynamics of Irish modern families when allocating allowances associated with children’s consumption of water and that a significant number of children will spend equally as much time in the home of their father and mother.

Our submission and recommendations can be read here.

Our CEO Karen was nominated by her son Cuán to do the Nice Bucket Challenge for One Family!

How does it work? 

1. Record your Nice Bucket Challenge, share it and nominate your friends or family members.
2. They have 24 hours to record a video of them being drenched in NICE water – at room temperature or luke warm (because lots of children told us they want to take part but icy water may not be so good for little ones *) – and share it on their social media #nicebucketchallenge.
3. They can make a donation to One Family by texting FAMILY to 50300.
4. They can then nominate 3 friends to take the Nice Bucket Challenge.

So what makes it nice? By nominating someone, you’re promising to also give them a nice surprise when they complete the challenge. This can be a card you make for them, a letter you write, a little present of their favourite bar of chocolate or treat, or you could do something nice for them like make them a cup of tea or wash the dishes. It’s a way to celebrate our family and friends by reminding them that they’re cherished.

One Family’s vision is an Ireland where every family is cherished equally and enjoys the social, financial and legal equality to create their own positive futures. We founded Family Day and celebrate family diversity with the Family Day Festival every year.

Text FAMILY to 50300 to donate €4 to One Family.

100% of text cost goes to One Family across most network providers. Some providers apply VAT which means a minimum of €3.26 will go to One Family. Service Provider LIKECHARITY 01 443 3890.

Watch Cuán and Karen’s Nice Bucket Challenge on our Facebook page here.

* Remember – safety first. Never leave children unsupervised around water.

In this week’s ’10 Ways to’, our series of weekly parenting tips, we look at how to support your child’s sex education.

Your role as a parent in your child’s education about relationships and sex is very important. Talking with your child about sex can be a fearful task for many parents but sex education is most effective when built up gradually over the years.

Toddlers may express curiosity but will usually be content with simple answers. As your child gets older, and starts school, their questions may become more complex. From the start, ensure honest, open communication.  Don’t ignore the subject, give inaccurate answers or brush off their questions – you don’t want your child to grow up being confused or embarrassed about sex and relationships.

Think about your views on sex and what matters to you in your relationships and family life. Working out your own values and morals will help you to give your child clear consistent messages about sex and relationships throughout childhood.

These ten tips should offer some helpful guidance:

1. The best person to talk with children about sex and sexuality is you, the parent whom they trust; they need to know this is a normal part of life.
2. Sexuality and relationships education should offer children the opportunity to explore and define their own values.
3. By age five children should be aware of touch and their body. They will be starting to understand about sexuality and should understand the correct names for body parts.
4. By age seven children will be starting to understand about reproduction in animals and in humans, and may be asking questions about where babies come from.  They will also start to become aware of different types of sexuality.
5. By the age of 12 years children will be aware of how their own bodies are changing, about sex and about contraception.
6. By this age, they should be supported to understand what a respectful relationship is and how to recognise and protect themselves from abusive relationships.
7. Support your child to have a healthy view of sex; just by talking with them does not mean they are going to have sex.
8. By secondary school they will have become very exposed to sex. Keep the conversation open and be ready to hear when they want more information about contraception. Contraception is not about sex – it is about taking responsibility; all parents need to support their children to be responsible for their actions.
9. Clear, honest, open communication with children about human sexuality and contraception, combined with fostering good self-esteem, is central to the prevention of early pregnancy.
10. Be brave; children are curious, very factual and love information. Remember how you learnt about sex and sexuality, was it the way you would wish for your child? It’s simply another conversation so take the leap and start it with your child today.

This week’s ’10 Ways to’ is by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Ways to Develop Coping Skills in Your Family; 10 Ways to Encourage Healthy Eating; and 10 Ways to Make the Most of the Playground.

For support and advice on any of these topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie. Find out more about our parenting skills programmes here.

Image credit: Pixabay

The board, staff and members of One Family congratulate our board member Sinéad Gibney on the announcement today of her appointment as Director of The Irish Human Rights and Equality Commission (IHREC). The commission was formed following the merger of the Equality Authority and the Irish Human Rights Commission to promote human rights and equal status in society.

Sinéad has served as a dedicated member of One Family’s board for the past two years. As a lone parent who had previously availed of the services of One Family, she brought a wealth of personal experience to the role, aligned with her passion for social justice and equality, commitment and achievement. She has been Head of Social Action for Google for six years, managing all of Google Ireland’s philanthropy portfolio including its flagship programme, Age Engage. Sinéad holds a BA in History from the University of Ulster, an MSc in IT and Education from Trinity College, a postgraduate cert from IADT in Cyberpsychology and most recently an MSc in Equality Studies from UCD.

Sinéad starts her new role on 20 October 2014. While she will be resigning from the board of One Family, we look forward to a continuing productive relationship. We wish her and the IHREC every success.

The press release issued by the IHREC can be read here.

Finding a babysitter you can trust and whom your child loves can seem like a daunting task, especially for parents who may not have family or close friends to ask or who live nearby. There are a number of online sites available now to help but where possible, a reference from someone known to us is still usually the best option so ask family, friends, neighbours and other parents at crèche, school or work. In this week’s instalment of our tips for parents series, we explore ways to find and keep a babysitter.

1. Advertise by word of mouth and in your local supermarket.  Involve your child in the process, explain to them why you need a sitter and how it will be great for all members of the family.  Help them to explore what they would want from a sitter. Children from the age of 2 years old and upwards are capable of this.
2. Ensure that the person you engage is over 16 years old. While there is no legal rule around this, you need to do everything possible to be sure that you are recruiting someone who will be experienced enough to be responsible and capable in many situations.
3. Invite the person over to your home for a play date. Get to know them a little and see how comfortable you and your children are with the sitter.
4. If you decide to go ahead, it is advisable to meet their parent if they are under 18 years old. You should ensure their parent is on board with their teen having this role and that they feel s/he is capable of such responsibilities.
5. Agree the babysitting fee in advance and also agree if you will collect the sitter and/or drop them home. Always be aware of how a young sitter travels home if you are returning from a late night out. If they are under 18, you have a level of responsibility for the babysitter.
6. Leave snacks for the children and sitter, and anticipate anything they may need while you are out. Give them a list of contact numbers. Talk with them in advance about what is expected of them, what rooms they can use, and how to manage any behavioural issues that may arise when you’re not present.
7. Ensure your children understand that the babysitter is in charge, will manage behaviour while you’re out as you have outlined, and will also report any issues to you. Also ensure that your child understands to let you know if they have any issues with the sitter.
8. Talk with the sitter about first aid, who to contact for emergencies, and if your child has any health or nightmares issues. Talk with them about toileting your child, nappy changing and feeding. Many teens will have no idea of how to carry out these tasks and may not have younger siblings so never assume that they know what to do or how to do it.
9. Establish rules and boundaries with the babysitter about if their friends and boy/girlfriends can call over, the use of phones while sitting, and if your children’s friends can call over.
10. Be reasonable about the length of time you leave the sitter with your child and the time you are coming home. The babysitter may need to know exactly what time to expect you so their parents can know what time to expect them home. A babysitter is not usually a child minder or childcare professional, so the level of responsibility assumed is less and it should be remembered they are usually capable of offering less.

This week’s ’10 Ways to’ is by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Ways to Support Your Child’s Sex Education; 10 Ways to Encourage Healthy Eating; and 10 Ways to Make the Most of the Playground.

For support and advice on any of these topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie. Find out more about our parenting programmes here.

Image Credit: Free Photos on Morguefile.com

Every month a member of the One Family services team explains more about the particular supports they offer. This month, Counselling Support Worker Lisa Maguire writes about One Family supports available to young people in care.

This service is for young people who are pregnant or already parenting and who are in care or have a care history. A range of emotional and practical supports are available through pregnancy and into parenthood. Young people can self-refer to the service. Because the service is client-led, interventions are tailored to meet their stated needs. Such ‘interventions’ might include assistance with accessing entitlements; one-to-one parenting sessions; advocating on behalf of clients to relevant authorities, and the provision of ‘listening ear’ support. This service works closely with One Family’s unplanned pregnancy counselling service too.

Young people with a care history might not have any dependable adults in their lives to whom they can turn for support, information and guidance. Our service offers these supports. Becoming a parent, especially for a young person, involves many changes and often many challenges; accessing support during the transition to parenthood can increase a sense of ‘being prepared’ and can reduce associated stress.

My interest in justice and equality and in empowering those most marginalised in our society led me to complete a degree in Social Studies in Social Care in 2003. Since then I’ve worked in a number of different sectors including the youth and residential care sector, with people who are homeless, and in the field of mental health.

One Family’s Young People in Care service gives me the opportunity to work in a client-centred service where clients develop a sense of their strengths and capabilities.

This is a free service which can be contacted directly by young people who can call or text me on 086 079 3072 or email me to find out more about it or to book an appointment. We also take referrals, and professionals working with young people can call me on 01 662 9212.

Children are a wonderful gift, but they are very delicate and it is often easy for them to feel unappreciated or ignored. As parents, it is very important to make sure our children are growing up happy and confident, and to do that we must make sure they feel special, appreciated, and loved. By recognising their accomplishments and encouraging them to be proud of themselves, we can help them to develop confidence and a sense of achievement that will last them the rest of their lives. In this week’s edition of parenting tips, we highlight 10 ways to improve your child’s self esteem.

1. Children who have lots of positive experiences and positive things said to them will have healthy levels of self esteem, as opposed to children who have many negative experiences growing up.

2. Children need to be recognised and admired. They are important to us and important in the world. Tell them this!

3. Praise children for the efforts they make. The focus should not be on the end result. Children remember praise and it has long-lasting effects.

4. Compliment children on their appearance, how they are doing at school, with friends and with hobbies. Every child is special and should know this.

5. Notice your children’s strengths and tell them what they are. Help them understand how to use those strengths well.

6. Show your child you are so proud of them and the effort they make – to play, to share, to eat dinner etc.

7. Have special time with your child each day and let them know they are top of your list. The feeling of self worth will be enormous.

8. Encourage children to be proud of their own achievements.

9. Encourage children to be open about what strengths they have and also that we all can’t be good at everything. Help them accept they are human, and it is normal to have strengths and weaknesses.

10. Be respectful of children. Talk with them, not at them. Listen to them and hear what they are trying to say. Understand their behaviours and why they exist rather than trying to just fix them. Admire their qualities, even those which are challenging can be used in positive ways throughout life. Accept your child for who they are and tell them everyday how much you love and admire them.

This week’s ’10 Ways to’ is by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Ways to Support Your Child’s Sex Education; 10 Ways to Survive Sleepless Nights; 10 Ways to Encourage Healthy Eating.

For support and advice on any of these topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie.

Image credit: Pixabay

Everyone is different, and it is important to be sensitive to that fact. Children look up to their parents and will imitate their behaviour, so the way you act towards others who are different can have a profound impact on them. By making sure you are respectful to everyone, you can ensure your children will do the same. In this week of our parenting tips series, we have 10 ways to respect the differences between yourself and others.

1. Be courteous and friendly to others.  You can help your child respect others by the way you greet people, talk with them, and talk about them afterwards. Children learn from our example.

2. Make a family book about similarities and differences:  You and your child could work together to make a book about the people in your family.

3. Value difference. Arrange a small get-together with one or two families. Each could make a snack that may be different or new to the others, possibly an ethnic food or one that is special in other ways for their family.

4. Meet new friends.  You may want to tell your child about a time when you met someone who seemed different at first but as you got to know the person, you came to appreciate him or her.

5. Use empathy: Can your child remember coming into a group and feeling ignored or left out? Talking about your child’s feelings can help your child develop empathy and begin to see things from another person’s point of view.

6. We believe that we are all special people.

7. Treat others kindly even if they are different.

8. We show we are listening by what we say.

9. We are concerned about each other’s feelings.

10. Use books, the internet and society to introduce your child to difference and in particular all types of families and how they are all unique and special – just like ours.

This week’s ’10 Ways to’ is by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Ways to Prepare Your Child for Preschool; 10 Ways to Improve Your Child’s Self Esteem; 10 Ways to Encourage Healthy Eating.

For support and advice on any of these topics, call askonefamily on 0818 66 22 12 or emailsupport@onefamily.ie.

Image Credit: Pixabay

New Futures :: New Confidence :: New Opportunities

Are you parenting on your own or sharing parenting? Do you want to get back into employment or education but struggle with where and how to start? Take time to discover who you are and what you want in life by joining One Family’s New Futures programme. Enhance yourself through confidence building, developing communication skills, and establishing life goals. Your future doesn’t have to be unknown. You can further your education or prepare yourself for employment with plenty of help along the way.

New Futures is a free 16 weeks of training with support programme, accredited at FETAC Level 4 /5, which takes place on two mornings per week in Dublin 2. One Family provides free childcare for participants, one to one mentoring throughout the programme, and additional supports and services where needed.

Are you interested?  If you would like more information, email Valerie or call 01 662 9212. One of our New Futures programme mentors will get in touch to arrange an initial meeting to help you decide if New Futures is the right choice for you.

Assertiveness is a wonderful quality to have, and as long as you know how to use it properly it can be help you be direct and clear in your communication with others. In order to be successful with communication, there are several guidelines we can all follow to ensure our point is being made in an assertive way.  In this week’s edition of our ’10 Ways to’ series of parenting tips, we look at 10 keys to being assertive.

1. Assertiveness is an approach that helps you to be direct, honest and respectful in expressing your feelings, wants, needs and opinions.
2. You should always be respectful of others and yourself when being assertive.
3. Being assertive should not mean being aggressive.
4. Use clear and direct communication instead of unclear or indirect communication.
5. Be more confident about how you say things and how you get your message across.
6. Assertiveness will help your children learn how to be assertive and help a family to be positive and have shared values.
7. Remember you are making requests not demands. Expect yes and no answers.
8. Be ready to negotiate and compromise with others, including children.
9. Be very specific with children in particular about what you need them to do. ‘I need you to tidy your room’ is too vague. Indicate certain areas of the room: ‘I need you to tidy your dolls today’ and explain what that should look like.
10. Learn to say no and explain why it is a ‘No.’ The ‘No’ is about you safeguarding yourself as opposed to blocking another person: ‘No, you cannot walk alone to the shops, I need you to be safe and I need to hold your hand to ensure this.’

This week’s ’10 Ways to …’ is compiled by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Tips for Respecting Difference; 10 Tips on Preparing Your Child for Preschool; 10 Tips on Improving Your Child’s Self Esteem

For support and advice on any of these topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or emailsupport@onefamily.ie.

Picture credit: Pixabay

Press Release

Compulsory registration of birth certificates will require

General Register Office to be highly trained 

One Family – Ireland’s organisation for one-parent families and people sharing parenting – today welcomed the publication of the Civil Registration (Amendment) Bill 2014 whilst also warning about the problems that will arise in some difficult cases requiring sensitivity and transparency from the country’s registrars.

The new Civil Registration Bill has some far reaching impacts for children and parents in one-parent and diverse families. The main change is that it will now be compulsory for a father’s name to be provided by a new mother and for the father to register themselves on the birth certificate. Exceptions can be made to this where the father’s identity or whereabouts are unknown by the mother or where she can furnish proof that it would not be in the best interests of the safety of the child to contact the father and register his name.

Karen Kiernan, CEO of One Family said: “It is very much in the interest of the vast majority of children to know and have a legal and social relationship with both of their parents and it relatively rare that father’s names are not on birth certs – approximately 6% of all certificates. However there are exceptional circumstances where it may not be safe for a father to be identified and contacted and the burden of proof will need to be carefully considered so that it is not too onerous for those women who have been subjected to rape, incest or violence.”

Kiernan continued: “The General Register Office personnel will need to configure their offices so that confidential and highly sensitive information can be shared by parents. They will require expert training and support to deal with the issues that may arise and a transparent system of how the registrar accepts or rejects evidence on exceptional circumstances. It would be extremely helpful if this new Bill can be accompanied by an information campaign targeting parents not married to each other so they have clarity on what joint birth registration means for them and their children. One Family is glad to see that the Minister has progressed from the argument that this is needed to save social welfare expenses to seeing that this is an important issue for children.”

The Bill can be read here.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to those working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 622 212, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes the Family Day Festival, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today, with 10,000 people attending in 2013 (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

One Family is disappointed about the narrow definition of family contained in Resolution A/HRC/26/L.20/Rev.1 that was passed at the UN recently, especially in this year of the 20th anniversary of International Year of the Family, but welcomes that Ireland voted NO.  Previous UN resolutions on the family include language, agreed by all States, that recognised that “various forms of the family exist”.

At the 38th Meeting, 26th Regular Session of the Human Rights Council, Ambassador Patricia O’Brien – Ireland’s Permanent Representative to the United Nations and other International Organisations at Geneva – said: “Families can form an important framework for the promotion of human rights, particularly of family members themselves. … for policies to be successful they should also be inclusive. If family is a living dynamic entity and can take many forms, we believe that we must all recognise this diversity, and indeed we have done so consistently over many years in many UN resolutions which recognise that in different cultural, political and social systems various forms of the family exist. We regret that the Resolution before us today fails to take account of the various forms of families which are a vital part of all of our society. For these reasons we will vote no.”

A video clip of the Ambassador’s presentation can be viewed here (scroll to no. 18 on the right). The results of the vote were: ADOPTED (26 YES / 14 NO / 06 ABSTENTIONS).

Organisations including Eurochild, of which One Family is a member, issued this statement:

Discussion of “protection of the family” at Human Rights Council must reflect diversity and focus on human rights

Our organizations, representing a wide range of civil society from all regions of the world, urge the UN Human Rights Council to ensure the Panel discussion entitled “protection of the family” scheduled to take place in September reflects the diversity of family forms and includes a focus on the promotion and protection of human rights of individuals within the family unit.

The decision to hold the Panel came in a resolution passed on 26 June 2014, as a result of the deeply flawed “protection of the family” initiative led by Egypt and other States at the UN Human Rights Council … Click to continue reading the Statement in full.