one-parent family – Page 2

Are you parenting alone or sharing parenting? Do you want your voice be heard and to be part of something that matters for one-parent families?

One Family is seeking willing participants to engage with our Policy Panel 2015. The Policy Panel will consist of ten-twelve lone parents and/or parents sharing parenting who will collaborate with us throughout 2015 in creating a Manifesto of things that Government needs to change for people parenting alone or sharing parenting and their children so they can create better futures.

Panel members will be encouraged to contribute their own lived experience and personal circumstances in order to enhance and parent proof One Family’s policy papers and budget submission. We welcome expressions of interest from women and men in a variety of circumstance, such as those in education or employment, in receipt of government supports, never married, separated or divorced and living in different areas around the country. The panelists will work with us to develop polices and submissions which reflect the lived reality for one-parent families in Ireland today.

Those interested in taking part should:

Wish to articulate their opinions and be comfortable discussing personal experiences and opinions, and core budget issues (housing, childcare etc.)
Currently live in Ireland – we hope to hear from people from both urban and rural areas
Be able to commit to a minimum of three hours per month (a mixture of phone and online engagement with occasional meetings in Dublin 2) on a volunteer basis

Existing One Family Members are encouraged to participate though it is not not essential for a panelist to be a Member.

If you are interested in being a One Family Policy Panelist in 2015, please complete the Expression of Interest Questionnaire here by 7 January 2015 and we will contact you in the New Year.

The term ‘absent parent’ refers to a parent whom a child has never met or has had very little contact with. Note: This is different to a ‘non-resident parent’, ‘non-primary’ or ‘secondary carer’, or when parents co-parent/share parenting of their child.

People find themselves parenting alone through a variety of circumstances. It is natural that children will become curious about their other parent and start to ask questions about them as they grow. This can be very difficult to deal with as a parent, especially if processing our own feelings of hurt, rejection, anger or grief. What is most important is to be prepared for this question, and to be consistent, honest and straightforward.

This week, our ’10 Ways to’ series becomes ’15 Ways’ as we explore how to explain an absent parent to your child.

Children will usually start to ask about their absent parent once they start school and start to notice that many children have two parents. Questions can increase as they grow – especially if they are working on family trees in school as they often do.
The best approach to take is to be brave and tell them that yes, they have two parents. Then start to tell them a little about the other parent.
You can tell them that the other parent was not yet ready to be a parent, perhaps that they were scared and choose not to do it. Reassure them that they have you and you are 100% committed to being their parent and to loving and supporting them.
There is no value in painting a negative picture of the parent who is absent for many reasons and young children don’t need negative information. Keep it simple and give the basic information they need for now. “Yes, you do have two parents, your other parent is called [their name].” Talk about any similarities the child might have to the other parent.
Take out any photographs you have of the other parent or photos with both parents. Talk with your child about when you and their other parent loved each other or really liked each other – whichever the case may be – and that you both made the child together.
Create a ‘shoe box parent’ for the child. This is a box where you can place anything which has a story about the child’s other parent. This could be photos, pictures you make together of what the parent looks like, what he or she liked to do or eat, or places you visited with them.
Talk with the child about any contact the other parent had with them and make it positive for them. When children grow up they will know the full story but for now, keep it simple. Children need to identify with both parents.
Give some thought to making contact with an absent parent if it is safe to do so. Allow the other parent an opportunity to explore some form of contact. If this can’t happen, then work with your child to help them understand that maybe the other parent will be ready to be a parent some day. Often when children are very keen to meet an absent parent, it is because they feel this parent will meet a currently unmet need. This often turns out not to be the case. Help your child to identify their needs so you can try to meet them.
Think about contact with extended family members of the other parent if you feel it is helpful for the child. Just because a person may not want to be a parent, that may not be the same for their family members. Enable grandparents in particular an opportunity to engage with their grandchild.
Always allow children to ask you many questions and talk with you. Expect that every three years or so, another round of questions will come. Be patient with your child and give them permission to talk about the absent parent and ask any questions.
Be honest and consistent and give them as much age appropriate information as you can. Often children just need basic information. They simply need to be able to say to other children, for example, “Yes, I have a daddy and his name is Jack.” Children are curious by nature so support them with this.
It may be very hard to talk with your child about all of this, but be brave, take a deep breath and do it and then get support for yourself afterwards. Remember that your relationship with the other parent and what you experienced is not what your child has experienced. Most children do not feel rejected by not knowing an absent parent, it is we as the parents who feel rejection.
Get support if you find it difficult to talk about the other parent. Many people don’t deal with the hurt and pain of the past and benefit from professional support to let go and move on. Allow life to give you all it has to offer.
If you became pregnant or a lone parent through an abusive experience or relationship, get support to deal with this. You can still support your child to have a positive healthy childhood. Children don’t need to know the circumstances of how they came to be. Talk with them about who is in their life and how much they are loved. You can explore with them what they imagine life would be like with two parents and help them further explore the negatives and positives of that life. Talk with them about how wonderful that vision is for them. Don’t try to corrode it by being negative. Tell them that you are glad they shared that with you. You can’t make it different so just be the best parent you can be for your child.
Children can grow up perfectly happily and successfully in a one-parent family, as current research shows. What they need are quality relationships with people in their life who like to spend quality time with them, people who understand them and who can support their needs. Once you can love your child and support them, they will and can be very happy and confident in their family form.

Next you might like to read 10 Ways to Talk With Your Child About “Where do I come from?”

This article is part of our weekly ’10 Ways to’ series of parenting tips, and is by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly. Coming soon: 10 Ways to Nurture Your Role as a Stepparent and 10 Ways to Make Christmas Stress Free.

LIVE Facebook Q&A with Geraldine on explaining an absent parent on Monday 17 November from 11am-12pm on One Family’s Facebook page. Join in and post your question.

Find out more about our parenting skills programmes and parent supports. For support and advice on these or any related topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie.

Press Release

Small Step to Make Work Pay:

One-Parent Family Payment and Income Disregard

www.onefamily.ie

(Dublin, Wednesday 5 November 2014) One Family – Ireland’s organisation for people parenting alone and sharing parenting – welcomes Tánaiste Joan Burton’s announcement that she will retain the level of the income disregard at €90 for those parents in work and in receipt of the One-Parent Family Payment (OFP), responding positively to One Family’s vociferous calls for its retention following a series of cuts impacting lone parents on social welfare in Budget 2012.

Stuart Duffin, One Family Director of Policy & Programmes, states: “This is a modest investment in poor working parents, helping to make work pay and helping to reduce child poverty. This responsive action by the Tánaiste recognises that many families require two salaries to meet expensive childcare and accommodation costs, something which a family on one income finds extremely difficult to do.”

He continues, “This small step can have a big impact as it will allow parents to stay in part-time work thus keeping their connection with the labour market and making it more likely that s/he will be able to progress to full-time employment when family life permits. We have seen parents have to leave part-time work since the income disregard was cut as work just didn’t pay for them anymore. Keeping the income disregard at this modest level will assist government policy of activating OFP recipients into the labour market.”

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO explains, “Prior to Budget 2012, 60% of those on the OFP were in work and today that has halved to around 33%. This is a reality which One Family does not want to see perpetuated. To maintain the income disregard at the €90 level will cost €8.3m in 2015 and approximately €15m in 2016 which is a small sum given what has been cut from individual one-parent families’ incomes over the past few years.

She continues, “Income disregards offer an immediate incentive and instant return for parents. However, this is just the first step in economic and social policy working together. More needs to be done to deliver high quality employment, affordable part-time education and appropriate training for those parenting alone so they can move out of consistent poverty. We look forward to working with the Department and the Tánaiste to ensure that the 39,000 parents coming off the OFP in July 2015 have access to quality information, advice, supports and opportunities tailored to their needs so that government policy will be a success instead of a failure.”

Note on Income Disregard

Parents can work and receive the One-Parent Family Payment. The amount of this payment depends on their weekly means. Currently the first €90 of parents gross weekly earnings is not taken into account (or disregarded). This means that parents can earn up to €90 per week and qualify for the full One-Parent Family Payment. Half the remainder of a parent’s gross earnings up to €425 per week is assessed as means. If parents earn between €90 and €425 per week they may qualify for a reduced payment. SW 19 Social Welfare Rates of Payment booklet shows the amount of OPF payable with a parent’s means. Social insurance contributions, superannuation/PRSA contributions and trade union subscriptions are not taken into account in the assessment of earnings. However, gross earnings must be below €425 before any deductions are allowed.

/Ends.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 as Cherish and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those sharing parenting, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to professionals working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 62 22 12, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes Family Day and presents the Family Day Festival every May, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy and Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 0622023

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

It is National Parents Week, a time to celebrate all the wonderful parents out there who are raising happy, healthy children in all kinds of circumstances and family structures. The routes to lone parenthood are many and varied, and everyone has their own story.

Recently Tina wrote to us after the birth of her little boy. His father has opted not to be a part of his son’s life. This is Tina’s story.

My name is Tina and I’m from Offaly. I’ve recently become a single parent and when I stumbled across this site I shed a few tears of happiness to see that I’m not alone.

My story started back in November 2013 when I started dating someone I’ve known for a while and thought was genuinely decent. After a few months together I started to get the inkling that I could be wrong and so stopped seeing him. When I split with him I came off the pill as I noticed I had started to gain a few pounds and wanted to trim down a bit but after two months with my tummy only getting bigger I decided to do a pregnancy test to rule out that reason. When the test displayed a positive result I was fit to collapse with the shock! I had been taking a contraceptive pill yet a little life was growing inside me.

I confirmed the result the next day with the doctor and felt the next step was to inform the father. I had already realised we weren’t a good match but I thought there was no reason why we couldn’t get along for the child’s sake. Then I met with him.

He spent hours trying to convince me to abort on the grounds that he had gotten back with his ex who he loved very much, that his mother would disown him for not being in a committed relationship with the mother of his child, and that he already has a dog who he considers his child.

When he realised I wasn’t going to do what he wanted and have an abortion, he then decided to hammer home how important it was never to reveal his identity and how this included my not pursuing him for maintenance. The last I heard of him he tried to get me to meet him to sign something that’d release him from paying maintenance.

I was now starting into my third trimester and also in the middle of trying to renovate my very dilapidated home on a very small budget. I was living in a house that had no doors, no kitchen, bare concrete floors, hardly any furniture and constant problems with pests. I had my aging father living with me who needs caring for as well. So I cried my tears and got over the shock and got on with it.

I dedicated the last few months to getting parts of the house ready and ensuring a healthy lifestyle. Two weeks ago I gave birth to a healthy little boy who is currently thriving. He has filled my heart with love and made all the pain and hard graft seem worth it. I have the support of a wonderful family. It is my mission in life to do whatever it takes to make sure that my little boy is loved and never feels an ounce of rejection as a result of what his father did.

When I see the blatant disregard for single parent families in this country it makes me sad and angry at the same time. My son doesn’t deserve to be a statistic or the subject of a study into the harsh implications of single parent life on a child’s wellbeing. When I came across this site, I was delighted to see that there’s someone fighting our corner.

I would like an Ireland where my son won’t have to be ashamed of how many parents he has. He has one sitting here writing this who would do anything in the world to protect him. I’ve done all I could and continue to do so for his happiness.

* The name and location of the author have been changed. Everything else remains her story in her own words, as told to One Family.

Press Release

Government Promised to Make Work Pay

But Budget 2015 Will Push More Vulnerable Families Out of Work

www.onefamily.ie

(Dublin, Tuesday 14 October 2014) One Family – Ireland’s organisation for people parenting alone and sharing parenting – today responds to Budget 2015 acknowledging the small increase in the universal child benefit and the partial reinstatement of a Christmas Bonus, yet noting that the failure to commit to retaining the Income Disregard level or provision of affordable accessible childcare prove that Government’s ears are still not fully open to the voices of Ireland’s one-parent and shared parenting families.

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO explains: “Enda Kenny said that this Budget would be about building for the future. Yet thousands of one-parent families are denied that opportunity. Research shows that it is poverty, not family structure, that most impacts on outcomes for children. While the child benefit increase of €5 and the partial re-instatement of the Christmas Bonus may be welcomed by some parents, these are not cost-effective measures that will impact on poverty levels in any tangible manner without being tailored to respond to need. 53% of lone parents are in the labour force yet one-parent families remain those statistically most at risk of poverty. Maintaining the Income Disregard would be an effective step towards making work pay, rather than forcing low and middle income families into the preposterous position of being less well-off when working.”

Stuart Duffin, One Family Director of Policy & Programmes, states: “Let’s be absolutely clear. If Government wants to invest money to help working parents, tailored investment in education and not expensive one-size fits all activation measures is a way of doing that. Together, both the NGO sector and the Government could do a lot more at far less cost by improving access to part-time education. Government must recognise the importance of locally tailored services.”

One Family’s 10 Solutions campaign – 10 effective measures that Government could implement at low or no cost – have been partially listened to but not fully addressed meaning that the disastrous legacy of Budget 2012 will continue to entrap one-parent families in poverty. With over 55,000 more lone parents being moved onto the live register by 2015, with little in place, more children will grow up in poverty.

Karen Kiernan continues: “One-parent families in working poverty and parents sharing parenting of their children have borne the brunt of spending cuts such as the changes to the Single Person Child Carer Tax Credit last year, and the ill-formed re-activation measures flagged in Budget 2012. Government should be doing everything it can to help poor children, not condemning more children to join them. There is no future in that.”

/Ends.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 062 2023

Many young children will start to wonder about and question where they came from, sometimes triggered by meeting new friends at school or learning that new little siblings will be coming into the family, while other children may have hardly any interest in the topic. Whatever your child’s level of curiosity may be, it’s helpful to think about what your answer will be in advance so that you’re not thrown whenever the question is asked.

Be honest with children. Explain things as simply as possible but always truthfully. Give them just enough age and developmentally appropriate information. Over time you can add more detail.
Try telling younger children that an egg and seed make friends and then it grows into a baby. They don’t have to know just yet how this actually happens. Sex discussions can come a little later.
Tell children that the baby is connected to Mum inside and when ready to come into the world, the doctors help the baby to be born .
Remember that families are diverse. Children are created in many ways. Explore this with your child. Don’t presume that all of your child’s classmates are all children of two biological parents. Some children will have same sex parents.
Your child may be adopted and may not know whose egg or seed they came from, but you can tell them that they have parents who love them and feel very lucky that some other person was able to share their child with them.
Explain to children that sometimes Mums and Dads don’t have eggs or seeds themselves so they have to be received from a kind person.
Talk with children about relationships. Explain that babies are usually made when two people care about each other a lot and want to have a special person. Explain also that sometimes only one parent is ready when this actually happens which is why some families are one-parent families. Sometimes a Mum and Dad might not live in the same house. Assure your child they are loved and wanted and special.
Use books to support your conversations with children. There are books for all ages to help explain all issues in life from making babies to death. Check out your local library and book shop.
Children often wish for more siblings. Maybe you have chosen not to have more children. Children grow out of this and really they long for more relationships, not necessarily siblings.
Grow things with your child, such as flower seeds. This helps them to understand that everything comes from somewhere. There is a process to everything that grows, just as there is to making babies.

This article is part of our weekly ’10 Ways to’ series of parenting tips, and is by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly. Coming soon: 10 Ways to Make the Most of Halloween and 10 Ways to Encourage Toddlers and Young Children to Eat.

One Family offers specialist support in explaining about an absent parent to a child. For support and advice on this or any related topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie. Find out more about our parenting skills programmes and parent mentoring service here.

Photo credit: Pixabay

Press Release

Government policies push more one-parent families out of work and into poverty –

One Family Annual Review 2013

www.onefamily.ie

(Dublin, Monday 29 September 2014) One Family – Ireland’s organisation for people parenting alone and people sharing parenting – launches its Annual Review 2013 amid ongoing trends of embattled parents leaving work due to poorly thought-out government policies, lack of quality out of school care and rising accommodation costs.

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO explains: “2013 was another hard year for one-parent families in Ireland. The poorly planned policies in Budget 2012 are pushing more people parenting alone onto social welfare fulltime as they cannot afford to work, attend education or get workplace experience due to government cuts. This makes no sense and is counter-intuitive as on the one hand government is forcing people onto the live register when their youngest child is seven, whilst at the same time making it harder for them to stay connected to the labour market as the income disregard has been slashed. We know that work isn’t working for far too many families. We must move on from attacking those parenting alone to addressing real needs by helping people stay in work by increasing the income disregard in Budget 2015.”

Stuart Duffin, One Family Director of Policy & Programmes, highlights: “One Family’s Annual Review 2013 shows a 20% increase in calls to our national askonefamily helpline specifically in relation to social welfare and finance issues as parents try to make work pay, often unsuccessfully. This is because the support they get from the State is continuing to decline in real terms, the barriers to returning to or staying in work can be insurmountable for many and government policies are working against them.”

One Family’s 10 Solutions campaign addresses this as a matter of urgency. Research shows that a key contributor to children’s futures is not the structure of their families but living in consistent poverty. Current policies mean that Ireland risks seeing more poor children becoming poor adults. This is catastrophic for their life chances and the public purse. But it is not too late to change this.

Karen continued: “We saw a massive increase in tax related queries as Budget 2014 removed the One Parent Tax Credit which is another example of the government not understanding the needs of families who share parenting of their children. The tough qualifications for rent supplement is also pushing people out of work and many families are becoming homeless – this is a matter of urgency.”

One Family’s Annual Review 2013 can be read/downloaded here.

A short video summarising One Family’s Annual Review 2013 and 5 key demands for Budget 2015 can be viewed here.

One Family’s demands for Budget 2015 are:

Work must pay for low-income families.
Income disregard cannot be cut anymore and the minimum hours qualification for FIS eligibility should be reduced.
Those on the OFP must have equal access to all of the government activation measures and access to free part-time education to help them get into sustainable careers.
Out of School Childcare needs to be recognised and supported so that parents can access education, training and work.
The Single Person Child Carer Tax Credit discriminates against those sharing parenting – most often against Fathers, and is out of step with the realities of contemporary Irish family life.

One Family’s full Budget Submission can be read here.

Lone parents are being forced out of employment. The ongoing reduction of the income disregard – the amount a lone parent in receipt of the One-Parent Family Payment can earn without a reduction in supports as they transition into employment – from €146.50 to €60 per week is working against Government policy. This reduction means that it is no longer financially viable for many to work which is the opposite of what Government claimed to set out to do – support lone parents into employment. Although 53% of lone parents are in the labour force, one-parent families remain those statistically most at risk of poverty. This cannot be justified.

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About One Family

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 062 2023

Children are a wonderful gift, but they are very delicate and it is often easy for them to feel unappreciated or ignored. As parents, it is very important to make sure our children are growing up happy and confident, and to do that we must make sure they feel special, appreciated, and loved. By recognising their accomplishments and encouraging them to be proud of themselves, we can help them to develop confidence and a sense of achievement that will last them the rest of their lives. In this week’s edition of parenting tips, we highlight 10 ways to improve your child’s self esteem.

1. Children who have lots of positive experiences and positive things said to them will have healthy levels of self esteem, as opposed to children who have many negative experiences growing up.

2. Children need to be recognised and admired. They are important to us and important in the world. Tell them this!

3. Praise children for the efforts they make. The focus should not be on the end result. Children remember praise and it has long-lasting effects.

4. Compliment children on their appearance, how they are doing at school, with friends and with hobbies. Every child is special and should know this.

5. Notice your children’s strengths and tell them what they are. Help them understand how to use those strengths well.

6. Show your child you are so proud of them and the effort they make – to play, to share, to eat dinner etc.

7. Have special time with your child each day and let them know they are top of your list. The feeling of self worth will be enormous.

8. Encourage children to be proud of their own achievements.

9. Encourage children to be open about what strengths they have and also that we all can’t be good at everything. Help them accept they are human, and it is normal to have strengths and weaknesses.

10. Be respectful of children. Talk with them, not at them. Listen to them and hear what they are trying to say. Understand their behaviours and why they exist rather than trying to just fix them. Admire their qualities, even those which are challenging can be used in positive ways throughout life. Accept your child for who they are and tell them everyday how much you love and admire them.

This week’s ’10 Ways to’ is by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Ways to Support Your Child’s Sex Education; 10 Ways to Survive Sleepless Nights; 10 Ways to Encourage Healthy Eating.

For support and advice on any of these topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie.

Image credit: Pixabay

Everyone is different, and it is important to be sensitive to that fact. Children look up to their parents and will imitate their behaviour, so the way you act towards others who are different can have a profound impact on them. By making sure you are respectful to everyone, you can ensure your children will do the same. In this week of our parenting tips series, we have 10 ways to respect the differences between yourself and others.

1. Be courteous and friendly to others. You can help your child respect others by the way you greet people, talk with them, and talk about them afterwards. Children learn from our example.

2. Make a family book about similarities and differences: You and your child could work together to make a book about the people in your family.

3. Value difference. Arrange a small get-together with one or two families. Each could make a snack that may be different or new to the others, possibly an ethnic food or one that is special in other ways for their family.

4. Meet new friends. You may want to tell your child about a time when you met someone who seemed different at first but as you got to know the person, you came to appreciate him or her.

5. Use empathy: Can your child remember coming into a group and feeling ignored or left out? Talking about your child’s feelings can help your child develop empathy and begin to see things from another person’s point of view.

6. We believe that we are all special people.

7. Treat others kindly even if they are different.

8. We show we are listening by what we say.

9. We are concerned about each other’s feelings.

10. Use books, the internet and society to introduce your child to difference and in particular all types of families and how they are all unique and special – just like ours.

This week’s ’10 Ways to’ is by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Ways to Prepare Your Child for Preschool; 10 Ways to Improve Your Child’s Self Esteem; 10 Ways to Encourage Healthy Eating.

For support and advice on any of these topics, call askonefamily on 0818 66 22 12 or emailsupport@onefamily.ie.

Image Credit: Pixabay

Press Release

Compulsory registration of birth certificates will require

General Register Office to be highly trained

One Family – Ireland’s organisation for one-parent families and people sharing parenting – today welcomed the publication of the Civil Registration (Amendment) Bill 2014 whilst also warning about the problems that will arise in some difficult cases requiring sensitivity and transparency from the country’s registrars.

The new Civil Registration Bill has some far reaching impacts for children and parents in one-parent and diverse families. The main change is that it will now be compulsory for a father’s name to be provided by a new mother and for the father to register themselves on the birth certificate. Exceptions can be made to this where the father’s identity or whereabouts are unknown by the mother or where she can furnish proof that it would not be in the best interests of the safety of the child to contact the father and register his name.

Karen Kiernan, CEO of One Family said: “It is very much in the interest of the vast majority of children to know and have a legal and social relationship with both of their parents and it relatively rare that father’s names are not on birth certs – approximately 6% of all certificates. However there are exceptional circumstances where it may not be safe for a father to be identified and contacted and the burden of proof will need to be carefully considered so that it is not too onerous for those women who have been subjected to rape, incest or violence.”

Kiernan continued: “The General Register Office personnel will need to configure their offices so that confidential and highly sensitive information can be shared by parents. They will require expert training and support to deal with the issues that may arise and a transparent system of how the registrar accepts or rejects evidence on exceptional circumstances. It would be extremely helpful if this new Bill can be accompanied by an information campaign targeting parents not married to each other so they have clarity on what joint birth registration means for them and their children. One Family is glad to see that the Minister has progressed from the argument that this is needed to save social welfare expenses to seeing that this is an important issue for children.”

The Bill can be read here.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to those working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 622 212, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes the Family Day Festival, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today, with 10,000 people attending in 2013 (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Press Release

Shortfalls for Children of Separated Parents in

Justice Committee Report on Draft

Children & Family Relationships Bill

www.onefamily.ie

(Dublin, Wednesday 9 July 2014) One Family – Ireland’s organisation for one-parent families and parents sharing parenting – welcomes the publication of the report from the Justice Committee on the Children & Family Relationships Bill 2014 tomorrow. With over 40 years campaigning for legal recognition and support for the wide diversity of families that children in Ireland live in, One Family believes that this Bill is long overdue. The focus now should be to ensure that it is passed as quickly as possible to meet the urgent needs of children and parents though it is disappointing to note that some important issues such as ancillary reports to courts and child safety were not highlighted in the report.

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO comments: “While this Bill is progress, it is disheartening that the Justice Report contains no mention of the need for ancillary services to the family law courts, especially Child Contact Centres which are necessary to ensure safety of children in contentious custody disputes. One Family published an evaluation of its pilot Child Contact Centre scheme in March this year and highlighted this need at the Committee hearing on 9 April. The Courts do not yet have access to professionally conducted family assessments in order to make evidence-based, child-centred decisions that will be safe, enforceable and fair. This has yet to be addressed for the safety of children.”

Stuart Duffin, One Family Director of Policy & Programmes, comments: “This report is a missed opportunity in a number of respects. Government places ever greater emphasis on the importance of children having meaningful relationships with both their parents yet the report fails to explore ways to mainstream services to support this in the face of family separation, especially for low-income families. When parents separate, benefits and allowances attach wholly to one parent or the other, with often the non-resident parent – most usually the father – becoming ‘invisible’ other than as a source of income. The report is not addressing this imbalance which has huge consequences for separated parents and their well-being, and that of their children.”

The Children & Family Relationships Bill will need to acknowledge the need for greater cooperation of services aimed at building broad local partnerships. It should result in quality, professional supports to cover the wide range of needs of families during separation and after, and when accessing the family law courts. It should ensure that legislators are equipped to make evidence-based decisions with children’s needs at the centre of these decisions.

Otherwise, while a step in the right direction, additional costs will be incurred to the State down the line while the Bill fails to fully deliver for children of separated families.

One Family’s Child Contact Centres Key Learnings can be read here: http://www.onefamily.ie/wp-content/uploads/One-Family_Child-Contact-Centre_Key-Learnings.pdf

The Executive Summary of the Evaluation can be read here: http://www.onefamily.ie/wp-content/uploads/Executive-Summary-December-2013.pdf

/Ends.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to those working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 622 212, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes Family Day and presents the Family Day Festival every May, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 062 2023

Further Information/Scheduling

Shirley Chance, Director of Communications | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 414 8511

Press Release

One-Parent Family Success Stories at One Family

Government Must Step Up to the Mark
and Enable Lone Parents to have a Fighting Chance in our Economy

www.onefamily.ie

(Dublin, Wednesday 18 June 2014) One Family – Ireland’s organisation for one-parent families – celebrates the achievements of almost 100 lone parents who have completed its courses throughout the past year at a Graduation Ceremony in the Conference Centre, Dublin Castle on Thursday 19 June at 10am in the week that it also makes its Pre-Budget Submission calling on Government to invest in one-parent families.

Recent response to media coverage of mother and baby homes has demonstrated again that people, women in particular, who parent alone still experience stereotyping, stigma and shame. One Family issued a statement in response to this harrowing topic last week which can be read here. This coverage has proved distressing for many One Family clients, lone parents and their children. Now, it is timely to celebrate those inspirational lone parents and people sharing parenting who have successfully overcome many challenges in pursuit of their awards.

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO, comments: “The parents celebrating their graduation this week want to learn more and they want to work. They want to build on the successes being celebrated. 58% of lone parents in Ireland today are working. One Family wants to see a clear political commitment in the 2015 budget to enable those most in need to return to work and education and create better futures for their children by provision of key supports such as affordable, quality childcare. An investment in childcare is an investment in one-parent families.”

Many of today’s Graduands have completed One Family’s flagship New Futures training which is FETAC Level 4 accredited and offers personal and professional development with wrap-around supports including one-to-one mentoring. Others have completed the One Family parenting programmes Family Communications and Positive Parenting, designed to strengthen family relationships, enable parents to understand difficult behaviour in children, and learn techniques to promote conflict resolution. Other parents who are parenting alone or sharing parenting are to be celebrated for taking a pro-active role in crafting One Family’s Pre-Budget Submission by participating in the organisation’s Budget Panel to help ensure that the voices of one-parent and shared parenting families are heard by Government.

One Family’s Director of Policy and Programmes, Stuart Duffin, comments: “One Family’s Budget Panel members are asking a simple question: ‘Will the 2015 budget improve the position of the poorest families and will children’s well-being be prioritised as the economy recovers?’ Paid work can make a difference for families, but this needs to accommodate the needs of children, income adequacy and security. The government’s focus has been on economic growth and jobs as a silver bullet solution to poverty. However, many lone parents and those sharing parenting cannot undertake or maintain enough paid work to sustain a family because of changes in tax and the lack of jobs. It is vital that government adopts a comprehensive strategy to reduce child and family poverty, a much broader strategy is needed to address the underlying causes.”

People parenting alone – including those parents receiving their Certificates this week – are all job-seekers and need to have adequate income to raise their children. All parents need sufficient levels of income security but today Ireland’s poorest families do not have enough to live on. It is crucial that the social welfare safety net that supports families in tough times is repaired and strengthened to enable the one-parent families who need to avail of it to create better outcomes. Children in all families deserve the chance to thrive.

/Ends.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to those working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 622 212, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes the Family Day Festival, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 062 2023

Further Information/Scheduling

Shirley Chance, Director of Communications | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 414 8511

Press Release

More Children Live in Poverty Because of Lack of Quality Childcare to Enable Lone Parents to Work

European Commission Highlighting of Childcare Provision Failure

for One-Parent Families Welcomed by One Family

(Dublin, Tuesday 3 June 2014) One Family – Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families in Ireland today – welcomes the highlighting of the need for quality affordable childcare for lone parents which would increase existing low levels of female participation in the workplace, ultimately reducing poverty levels and social exclusion for children, by the European Commission this week.

There has been a significant shift of emphasis in social policy to early years interventions targeted to help children from poorer backgrounds. In many respects this focus is welcome: it acknowledges, for example, that disadvantage starts from birth and needs to be corrected for from the outset of children’s lives. Government fully recognises the value of an accessible childcare system and now needs to deliver it.

Yet despite the widespread recognition of the critical importance of the early years, our Government often seems to fail to acknowledge the reality of child poverty in Ireland today and to design interventions that truly tackle the hardships that poor children encounter. Those living in lone parent households continue to experience the highest rates of deprivation with almost 69% of individuals from these households experiencing one or more forms of deprivation (EU-SILC 2010).

Childcare is particularly expensive in Ireland and, coupled with a ‘low pay premium’ for part-time work, this plays a significant role in whether or not the financial benefits to paid work outweigh the costs for lone parents – the often referenced ‘welfare trap’. We have heard from parents who desperately want to return to work to improve the standard of living for their children and future outcomes, but who have been forced to turn down opportunities owing to a lack of affordable, accessible childcare.

Among One Family’s many services for lone parents and those sharing parenting, we support parents to be able to access work, including good quality part-time/flexible opportunities. Without good quality childcare many lone parents remain simply unable to take up employment opportunities.

Success in achieving such a childcare system would provide a significant boost to the economy. Parents who currently stay at home to care for their children would be able to work if they wished to do so. This would increase family incomes, improve living standards and reduce dependence on benefits, as well as lifting children out of poverty and improving their learning and development outcomes.

One Family reiterates its call to Government to enact its 10 Solutions campaign, with an immediate focus on childcare. All children deserve the best start in life.

For further information on One Family’s 10 Solutions, click here.

/Ends.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families and people sharing parenting offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to those working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 622 212, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes the Family Day Festival, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 062 2023

Further Information/Scheduling

Shirley Chance, Director of Communications | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 414 8511

Kitty Holland writes in the Irish Times today about the distressing case of Sabrina McMahon, a lone parent who has been spending nights with her three young children in their car. Housing concerns and worries are the cause of continuous stress for many of the parents One Family works with, with many telling us they are ‘on the edge’.

Good secure housing enhances children’s well-being and helps provide stability for family relationships, schools and development. The housing crisis is a challenge for Minister Burton that she has to resolve for Budget 2015.

Every month, we invite responses to our anonymous, 3 question survey. Last month’s was on Housing Supports. Comments made by some of those who took the survey included:

I’m from Dublin and still have family there but I was forced to move to Wicklow in 2007 where I have no family or supports.

I can’t do a Masters in Education as I was planning, as I live over 45 km from the college I would have had to attend and I would not be able to afford the journeys.

Having to move constantly due to rent increases takes up time, money and creates instability. A constant home is essential in maintaining positive routine.

Security of place is very important for emotional stability of the children.

Longer leases, RAS (Rent Allowance Supplement) to be more attractive for landlords and to be extended beyond a once off, and more social housing is key with rent to buy schemes in place.

The Housing Supports survey results can be read here. This will be a key topic of One Family’s Budget 2015 submission.

This month’s survey is on Housing and Rent Supplement Limits and can be taken here.

Press Release

Childcare 101 – Government must Prioritise Childcare Provision as a Downturn-Buster

(Dublin, Monday 7 April 2014) One Family – Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families in Ireland today – outlines the three major reasons that provision of affordable, accessible childcare is a necessity if Ireland is to make a full economic recovery soon. A new report due for release by the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD) will show that a family in Ireland with two children spends 40% of its average wage to meet childcare costs. Ireland is one of the most expensive countries worldwide for childcare services, second only to the US, and this is financially crippling and impeding low income and one-parent families from successfully moving into or staying in employment.

ONE: The rising participation of women in paid work has heightened demands for affordable, high-quality child care programmes, particularly for those parenting alone. There is a greater focus on the need for programmes that can prepare children to succeed at school, improve the well-being of vulnerable children, and enable the participation of parents in the labour force and in continuing education. Provision of childcare delivers on the Government’s own policy of welfare to work.

TWO: Childcare must be seen as a whole of Government programme and childcare policy should be integral to the attack on poverty. Channelling support for parents through the tax system will help to make work pay. Stuart Duffin, One Family Director of Policy & Programmes, comments: “In Ireland, childcare is mainly left to the market. The unsurprising consequence is that the poorer the area, the scarcer and less affordable the childcare. Affordable, available childcare remains a myth for too many families. Focussing and delivering on an outcome based budget this year, which asserts the enabling role of childcare across Government, will deliver a thriving economy and create better lives for all families, particularly those parenting alone for whom the welfare trap can be more difficult to escape.”

THREE: High quality, regulated childcare (through an enhanced quality assurance system), incentivised through tailored tax credits, will give Ireland a leading edge for inward investment. Good childcare also promotes quality jobs, quality careers and a quality workforce. A new Community Employment initiative treats its childcare placements like an apprenticeship. This is a structured and quality labour-market entry programme for those who want to progress into employment in this area. One Family calls for increased availability of these places, which will enable those in receipt of social welfare benefits an opportunity to move into gaining real marketable skills, and raise the level of professionally qualified workers in the sector. Childcare promotes economic and workforce development.

One Family reiterates its call to Government to enact its 10 Solutions campaign, with an immediate focus on childcare. All children deserve the best start in life.

Further information on One Family’s 10 Solutions is available here.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to those working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 622 212, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes the Family Day Festival, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today, with 10,000 people attending in 2013 (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 062 2023

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Would you like to contribute to our Budget 2015 submission? It’s easy – simply take our anonymous 3 question survey. Each short monthly survey has a focus on a different budget submission topic.

This month’s survey is on Housing Supports.

Take the survey and know that your voice is heard.

If you would like to view the results of previous surveys, they are available here.

Press Release

Childcare Provision Failure is One of Government’s Harshest Blows to One-Parent Families

www.onefamily.ie

(Dublin, Wednesday 19 March 2014) One Family – Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families in Ireland today – responds to the pending publication of a new report due for release later this month by the Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD) which will show that a family in Ireland with two children spends 40% of its average wage to meet childcare costs. Ireland is one of the most expensive countries worldwide for childcare services.

One Family has been calling for affordable, accessible childcare for many years and putting forward to Government our no-cost and low-cost solutions as part of our 10 Solutions campaign. Lack of childcare remains one of the greatest barriers to lone parents wishing to return to work and/or education. Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO, responds to the pending publication of the OECD report as follows: “This new report is timely. Currently Minister Fitzgerald is reviewing the myriad of child support schemes and their impact on low income families. One Family is recommending an amalgamation of supports into a single accessible and tailored Childcare and Out of School Care financial support programme to ensure work pays for low income families and enables them to get out of consistent and persistent poverty.”

Lone parents on social welfare will be activated (turned into job-seekers) when their youngest child is 7 years old. Success relies on activation being underpinned by local, affordable, accessible and quality child and out of school care. This is not the case as the spread and reach of services is patchy. Stuart Duffin, One Family’s Director of Policy & Programmes, comments, “There is little room for injecting funding into delivery of existing services so we need to be creative, innovative and entrepreneurial in how we craft and model provision using available resources and assets. The outcomes need to support the needs of parents and the exchequer.”

Worldwide, many innovative schemes are in place. Yesterday a major new childcare package was launched in the UK. It aims to help millions of parents, enabling them to go out to work and providing more security for their families, while directing extra support to those children from disadvantaged backgrounds through a tax free Childcare allowance. In New Zealand, the Out of School Care and Recreation (OSCAR) Subsidy is proving to be a good economic policy.

Government is charged to commit to protecting and building childcare and out of school care spaces in both the short and long term, for families in transition and particularly for those parenting alone. For low-income parents, the lack of access to quality and affordable childcare remains a fundamental challenge to participation in the labour market. Their ability to work is jeopardised which makes the entire childcare system vulnerable and ultimately the economy as a whole. Provision of childcare and OSCAR, both before and after-school care, is an economic driver. A value-for-money and quality assured childcare service can be delivered by a well designed tax credit system which can provide the targeted support needed to help lone parents secure the employment opportunities that would lead to financial independence.

One Family reiterates its call to Government to enact its 10 Solutions campaign, with an immediate focus on childcare. All children deserve the best start in life.

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to those working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 662 212, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes the Family Day Festival, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today, with 10,000 people attending in 2013 (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Stuart Duffin, Director of Policy & Programmes | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 062 2023

Further Information/Scheduling

Shirley Chance, Director of Communications | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 414 8511

As part of our ’10 Ways to …’ series which offers tips for parents on a variety of topics, here are our ‘10 Ways to Build and Maintain a Close Relationship with your Teenager‘.

Talk with them: Talking to your teenager, not at them, is the key to good communication.
Listen: Listen to what they have to say and ask questions to help you understand their thinking. Sometimes you need to just accept that they see things differently to you.
Empower them: Help your teen find their own solutions to their issues. Don’t give so much advice – let them think it out.
Let them make mistakes: We all learn from making mistakes. Stop trying to make the world perfect for your teen, they need space to learn. You can be there to support them when times are hard.
Share with them: You may hate watching the Kardashians or football on TV but if your teenager loves them then make the effort to sit and watch it with them. This can be a bonding experience and you will get great insight into how their mind works by doing this.
Make dates: Life is busy as a teen. Make a date with your teenager to do something together and don’t break it – keep it a regular thing.
Forget about their bedroom: Most teens can cause havoc in homes over untidy bedrooms. Try setting some rules that washing must be placed in the wash basket and dishes and food all brought to the kitchen. After that forget it. Public spaces within the home must be respected by all but allow them keep their room as they like it.
Like their friends: and boyfriends/girlfriends. You may not particularly like another teen but try to get to know them and be respectful of them. It’s better to have your teenager hanging out in your home than their friends as then you can know more about what’s going on.
Taxi time: It’s horrid but has to be done. It’s only for a few years but it’s necessary. At least if you bring your teen somewhere and collect them you may have more peace of mind than worrying who they are getting lifts with.
They are teens not babies: Teens from 12 years old onwards want to be treated as young adults – with the exception of when they are sick or tired and want to be babied again. Give them responsibilities, trust them and expect them to follow rules. Don’t judge them too quickly as they are only learning.

The ’10 Ways to …’ series is compiled by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Ways to Enjoy School Breaks and 10 Ways to Improve Listening in the Home.

The One Family parenting courses Positive Parenting and Family Communications are enrolling now for March. Click here for information.

As part of our ’10 Ways to …’ series which offers tips for parents on a variety of topics, here are our ‘10 Ways to Healthier Eating‘.

Menu: Plan the menu for the week ahead and make a list of the ingredients you will need. When you make a trip to the supermarket, stick to the menu created.
Bring children shopping: Include children by bringing them to the supermarket with you. Tell them you have a list of what to get and that you are only buying things that are on the list. Show them all of the interesting fruit and vegetables on display. Try to buy a new vegetable or fruit each week.
Get children an apron: Involve children in cooking – children from 2 years upwards can help with family cooking. The more children are involved in preparing healthy meals the more eager they will be to eat or at least taste what has been prepared.
Visit a vegetable farm: Let children see how things grow and maybe plant some vegetables at home. Go fruit picking and try making some homemade jams.
Educate children. Talk to children about their bodies and about all the things that our bodies need to stay healthy. Introduce food as one concept. Talk about the different types of food and what they can do for our health. Try Google for lots of ideas or look to the 1000 Days Campaign for inspiration which explores the profound impact the right nutrition has on a child’s ability to grow and learn.
Role model: Be a role model for your child. You must do as you say and eat your own veggies. Find ways to make them taste nicer by looking up some new recipe ideas. Try to get over your own childhood horrors of eating vegetables.
Days out: Get into the habit of bringing healthy snacks as treats. Grapes, melon, dried fruit, wholemeal crackers, yogurts etc are all nutritious and delicious.
3 meals: Encourage children to have 3 healthy meals each day and if possible sit at the table together to eat them. Don’t make meal times and eating a big issue however. Children need to get positive attention for good behaviours. Forcing children to eat and making them sit at the table for long periods will cause poor eating habits and lead to poor health.
Involve children: Ask children what they like to eat and involve them in making lunches and planning the menu.
Reward: Reward children for trying new foods. They don’t have to like the food but trying it is what you want to see. Never only offer a new food to a child once. From weaning onwards, offer a new food at least 20 times over a period of weeks before you resolve to the fact that your child really does not like it.

The ’10 Ways to …’ series is compiled by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Ways to Enjoy School Breaks, 10 Ways to Improve Listening in the Home and 10 Ways to Build and Maintain a Close Relationship with your Teenager.

The One Family parenting courses Positive Parenting and Family Communications are enrolling now for March. Click here for information.

As part of our ’10 Ways to …’ series which offers tips for parents on a variety of topics, here are our ‘10 Ways to Survive Working Outside of the Home and Being a Parent of Young Children’.

Be organised: Over organise everything – lunches, dinners, clothes.
Cook and freeze: At the weekend, cook some favourite meals and freeze them for during the week – the children can help, they love helping!
Stop washing: Keep the laundry for Friday evening and finish it on Saturday. Most children have enough clothes to last the week.
Sleep: Go to bed as early as you can and forget about the telly. Record your favourite programmes instead and watch at the weekend. If this isn’t possible then ask your friends what’s happening in soap land.
Eat: Eat at work! Don’t go home hungry with hungry children, homework and whatever else you may face. Try to be ready for the onslaught when you get in the door.
Public transport: Use it if you can as this way you can get some extra sleep, read, check texts, emails and have some ME time. If in your car, try to listen to some nice music and relax on the journey.
Exercise: Do it on your lunch break as it will help keep the happy hormones alive. Just 15 minutes of fresh air will help you feel you are looking after yourself.
Stay calm: Breathe and remember it will all be okay. Everything takes longer when you have children so expect the process of getting out in the morning or getting anything done to go slowly.
Play: Allow time to play with your children in the evening. Quality time is as crucial as good nutrition – they will sleep better if they have time with you and share your day.
Enjoy: Your children are little and life can be hard but they will grow up so fast so enjoy the pleasure they can bring you. Try not to worry so much about getting everything done, just try to get done what must be done.

The ’10 Ways to …’ series is compiled by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Ways to Enjoy School Breaks, 10 Ways to Improve Listening in the Home, 10 Ways to Build and Maintain a Close Relationship with your Teenager, and 10 Ways to Healthier Eating.

The One Family parenting courses Positive Parenting and Family Communications are enrolling now for March. Click here for information.

As part of our ’10 Ways to …’ series which offers tips for parents on a variety of topics, here are our ‘10 Ways to Make Reading a Part of Family Life‘.

Join the library. The whole family could take a trip to the local library and sign up. It’s free! Find out what’s happening in your local library as they run great events too and you can then plan your family trips to correspond with events.
Read together. Plan a time each day, or at least three times a week, to read together. Let the children read to their parent or parents to child. When a child becomes familiar with a story they can tell it from the pictures or from their memory – encourage this!
Start a library in your home. Go the second hand shops and get great books for very little cost.
Switch off the TV. For one evening every week, switch on the story telling in the family instead of the telly.
Start early. Introduce children to books from six months onwards; bath books, music books and picture books.
Role model. Let children see you read books and use books to find out about things. Yes, there’s Google but let children know there are other ways too.
Bring books. Wherever you go – when in the car, in a queue, on a bus trip going to Granny’s – bring a book with you. You can pass the time reading to your child or encourage them to read themselves if you are driving or talking with someone.
Visit book shops. They can be great fun. Let children see all the books they can choose from. Talk to them about authors and check out when writers are signing in shops.
Create your own book. Encourage older children (6+) to write their own stories and to create pictures about simple things they like in life. You could get them bound and keep them forever.
The Benefits. Reading together creates quality time which results in improved relationships. It teaches children about the world and the people in it. It helps develop imagination, increases your child’s language and vocabulary which improves chances at school, and concentration levels grow as stories gets longer with age. At bed time, reading helps us relax and can enable children to fall asleep more quickly.

The ’10 Ways to …’ series is compiled by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

Coming soon: 10 Ways to Enjoy School Breaks, 10 Ways to Improve Listening in the Home, 10 Ways to Build and Maintain a Close Relationship with your Teenager, and 10 Ways to Healthier Eating.

The One Family parenting courses Positive Parenting and Family Communications are enrolling now for March. Click here for information.

Press Release

Children & Family Relationships Bill provides first steps to a modern Family Law system in Ireland –

but One Family warns that family law courts need the resources to do their job properly for all children

(Dublin, Thursday 30 January 2014) One Family – Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families in Ireland today welcomes the publication of the Heads of the Children & Family Relationships Bill 2014 by Minister Alan Shatter. As an organisation that has campaigned for over 40 years for legal recognition and support for the wide diversity of families that children live in, we believe this Bill is a good first step that is long overdue.

Karen Kiernan, One Family CEO explains: “This Bill when enacted will provide a higher level of legal security for some of the diverse one-parent families that children live in. We are particularly pleased to see that people who have caring responsibility for children such as step-parents will be able to apply for guardianship, that it will be easier for extended family members such as grandparents to gain contact with their grandchildren and that more non-marital fathers will become guardians automatically of their children.”

However, One Family has some serious concerns about how aspects of the Bill can really be implemented given the serious resource restrictions that exist, and the lack of consistency and specialist knowledge that can characterise some family law proceedings and the requirement to hear children’s voices.

Kiernan continues: “We are very concerned about the lack of family assessments available to judges in family law courts which can be essential when upholding the principle of ‘a child’s best interest’. We have seen that it is extremely difficult to make nuanced and life-changing decisions without full, impartial information on what is going on in a family. A robust court welfare system will need to be put in place that can assess issues such as child protection, domestic violence, parental capacity so that judges can make informed, reasoned decisions. Such a system could also effectively hear the voice of children of all ages. The current Heads indicates that the costs of such reports, counselling, mediation or parenting courses as ordered by court will be borne by the parents involved and this is not realistic for many families.

It is time that a standardised, holistic, family-centred approach is taken to family law in Ireland where the starting point has to be the child and their family rather than the traditions of the legal system. The Bill is well-intentioned but will need an implementation plan with an attached budget to really make a difference.”

Part of what Minister Shatter is working to resolve is in relation to parenting orders and plans that are not adhered to. One Family offers a range of specialist counselling and parenting supports to people going through separation, sharing parenting of their children as well as those who parent alone. One Family also ran the two pilot Child Contact Centres over the past three years in partnership with Barnardos – a service that is now closed due to lack of government funding.

Karen Kiernan further explains: “Whilst much of this Bill is an excellent improvement on what was there, there is a big miss in relation to Child Contact Centres which are not mentioned. They have been proven to be needed and effective in reducing the dangers for children in high conflict families, in ensuring parenting orders work and in supporting families to move on to self-arranged contact. No Government department has been willing to continue funding them and they are not provided for in the Heads of Bill as a necessary service for courts.”

About One Family

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Further Information/Scheduling

Shirley Chance, Director of Communications | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 414 8511

2014 is the 20^th anniversary of the United Nations International Year of the Family. One Family has been working to mark this anniversary and marks the UN International Day of the Family every year here in Ireland.

One Family has signed up to the Declaration of the Civil Society on the occasion of the 20^th Anniversary of the International Year of the Family.

We have developed links in relation to this anniversary and attended the Doha International Institute for Family Studies and Development (DIIFSD), The International Federation for Family Development (IFFD) and the Committee of the Regions of the European Union in cooperation with the Focal Point on the Family (UNDESA) European Expert Group Meeting ‘Confronting family poverty and social exclusion; ensuring work-family balance; advancing social integration and intergenerational solidarity’ as preparations for and observance of the twentieth anniversary of the International Year of the Family in 2014, in Europe.

We also founded a campaigning coalition called All Families Matter and we are seeking a progressive review of the Constitution in relation to the family.

Proposed activities to mark 2014 as the 20^th Anniversary of the UN International Year of the Family

We are calling on the Government to designate a national Family Day.

15 May is the annual UN International Day of the Family and One Family requests that Minister Fitzgerald designates the nearest Sunday as a national Family Day in Ireland. In much the same way as we mark Mother’s Day and Father’s Day, we would like Family Day to also be celebrated. Our annual Family Day Festival will be held on 18 May 2014 again in the Iveagh Gardens and we will be again promoting our call to ‘Celebrate your family – Celebrate all families’ through all the schools, community and voluntary groups in Ireland.

We believe that this cost-neutral designation will send a powerful message to all families that this country respects and celebrates the reality of their lives through this national Family Day.

We are seeking support to hold a seminar to mark a number of significant reforms in relation to family life in Ireland. In a relatively short space of time the legal and social landscape in relation to families will change. Reforms that we are aware of include:

– The establishment of the Child & Family Agency

– Reform of the Family Law Courts

– Introduction of the Child & Family Relationships Bill

– Commitment to a referendum on marriage equality in 2015

– Social welfare reforms impacting on childcare, parenting responsibilities and family life.

2014 may provide an opportune time to reflect on these changes and to work towards a Constitutional reform of the definition of family which will inevitably be required at some stage. A conference or seminar will provide a forum for people to learn more about reforms and to look forward to a new vision of how our laws and policies can reflect the reality of the diversity of family life in Ireland today.

One Family also plans to highlight the year with a number of other smaller events which will be kicked off by a radio documentary on the founding of our organisation over 40 years ago which will be aired at 9am on Sunday 29 December on Today FM.

Press Release

New Report Proves Marriage is not Responsible for Children’s Well-being

(Dublin, Friday 20 December 2013) One Family, Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families, welcomes the launch today of the report ‘Growing Up in a One-Parent Family’, a study by researchers at the University of Limerick using the ‘Growing Up in Ireland’ data, published by the Family Support Agency.

A key finding of the study indicates that children from one-parent families and cohabiting families fare the same as children from married families when faced with similarly difficult conditions growing up. This is most detailed statistical study to date of the effects of family structure on child development, and concludes that the traditionally perceived benefits of marriage in relation to child development are not a result of marriage itself but of the parent or parents’ background.

Karen Kiernan, CEO of One Family, states: “This study confirms what One Family has known for years, based on our 41 years of experience working with one-parent families and our evidence-based knowledge, that it is not the legal structure of a family that is important to a child’s well-being but the substance of the family and the relationships within it. However, lone parents in Ireland continue to experience the highest rates of poverty and it is impoverishment that is proven to adversely affect a child’s future. We will continue in our vital work towards ending disadvantage for lone parents and their children.”

While the report also found that, despite controlling for school context and a variety of background factors, children from never-married one-parent families and cohabiting families did less well in their educational performance, it states that they are also more likely to be attending a disadvantaged – DEIS – school. Education and progression opportunities for parents are a core part of One Family’s work towards breaking the cycle of disadvantage.

The report ‘Growing Up in a One-Parent Family:The Influence of Family Structure on Child Outcomes’ is available to read/download here.

Notes for Editors:

1 in 4 families with children in Ireland is a one-parent family
Over half a million people live in one-parent families in Ireland
Almost 1 in 5 children (18.3%) live in a one-parent family (Census 2011)
There are over 215,000 one-parent families in Ireland today (25.8% of all families with children; Census 2011)
87,586 of those are currently receiving the One-Parent Family Payment
Those living in lone parent households continue to experience the highest rates of deprivation with almost 56% of individuals from these households experiencing one or more forms of deprivation (EU-SILC 2011)

About One Family

One Family was founded in 1972 and is Ireland’s leading organisation for one-parent families offering support, information and services to all members of all one-parent families, to those experiencing an unplanned pregnancy and to those working with one-parent families. Children are at the centre of One Family’s work and the organisation helps all the adults in their lives, including mums, dads, grandparents, step-parents, new partners and other siblings, offering a holistic model of specialist family support services. These services include the lo-call askonefamily national helpline on 1890 622 212, counselling, and provision of training courses for parents and for professionals. One Family also promotes Family Day, an annual celebration of the diversity of families in Ireland today, with 10,000 people attending events this year on 19 May (www.familyday.ie). For further information, visit www.onefamily.ie.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Further Information/Scheduling

Shirley Chance, Director of Communications | t: 01 662 9212 or 087 414 8511

Small Step to Make Work Pay:

One-Parent Family Payment and Income Disregard

Government Promised to Make Work Pay

But Budget 2015 Will Push More Vulnerable Families Out of Work

Government policies push more one-parent families out of work and into poverty –

One Family Annual Review 2013

Compulsory registration of birth certificates will require

General Register Office to be highly trained

Shortfalls for Children of Separated Parents in

Justice Committee Report on Draft

Children & Family Relationships Bill

One-Parent Family Success Stories at One Family

Government Must Step Up to the Mark and Enable Lone Parents to have a Fighting Chance in our Economy

More Children Live in Poverty Because of Lack of Quality Childcare to Enable Lone Parents to Work

European Commission Highlighting of Childcare Provision Failure

for One-Parent Families Welcomed by One Family

Childcare 101 – Government must Prioritise Childcare Provision as a Downturn-Buster

Childcare Provision Failure is One of Government’s Harshest Blows to One-Parent Families

Children & Family Relationships Bill provides first steps to a modern Family Law system in Ireland –

but One Family warns that family law courts need the resources to do their job properly for all children

Proposed activities to mark 2014 as the 20th Anniversary of the UN International Year of the Family

New Report Proves Marriage is not Responsible for Children’s Well-being

Government Must Step Up to the Mark
and Enable Lone Parents to have a Fighting Chance in our Economy

Proposed activities to mark 2014 as the 20^th Anniversary of the UN International Year of the Family