Lone parents and relationships
During your pregnancy, and when your baby is born it is important to give time to considering the role of the other parent; while also giving yourself permission to have an adult relationship, with someone other than the other parent. Communication is key in all strong relationships, so if and when you meet someone, remember to be proud of your family form, tell them about your role as a Mum when you are ready however feel under no pressure to introduce them to your baby until you feel the relationship maybe secure. It can be very tempting to focus one hundred percent of your time and energy on your baby and allow all other relationships disappear, but remember babies grow up one day and it is good for children to see parents in healthy relationships. Sharing parenting and supporting each other to parent is also a key relationship that you can model for your child. This will be hard work as all parent relationships are, but you can do it when you remain focused on what is best for your child.
New relationships for you and the other parent will inevitably be part of your future when you are sharing parenting. When communication is clear and direct these situations can be managed very positively. It is important to allow new relationships to develop that add to your own happiness which will in turn support you as a parent. Seeking some support from family mediation can help you and the other parent to look at what role you can both play in your child’s life. Finding agreements that work for now is always good, plans will need to be reviewed as your baby grows. Children do however have a right to access with both parents when it is safe for them to do so. Being open to this will support your child long-term. Don’t be afraid of the awkward questions as children grow, tell them the truth of their family form, in a way that works for their age and build on that truth as they grow. It is okay to live to two households with parents on different days, it is okay for Mum or Dad to have a partner who is not a parent of their child. Just keep talking and you will make a wonderful parent.
