Family Communications | Week 2 |

Clear and Direct Communication

Resources | Exercise 2




After reading the above response can you answer the following questions:

  • What are the benefits of being assertive – also known as clear and direct communication – for you and for the person you are communicating with?
  • Can you think of a situation recently with one of your children or the other parent? Can you think back to how you engaged in the conversation?
  • Can you now explore the same conversation and imagine how you may have engaged in a clearer and direct way?
  • How may the outcome have changed?

Can you see from the scenario, the assertive approach, that how you respond and how you ask can change the outcome completely. It does not matter so much if the other person does not understand clear and direct communication, if you persist in communicating in a clear and direct way you will greatly impact on the outcome of the conversation.

  • Can you practice it with your children and with the whole family?
  • Ask your children for feedback – tell your children you are aware that at times you may not communicate in a way with them which can be productive. Tell them you are practicing being more assertive. Tell them the technique you are going to use. By allowing your children be part of this process you are supporting them to see that you may not be perfect but you are aiming to be a good enough parent. You are teaching your children skills of clear and direct communication which will not only support them in the home, in the relationship they have with you as their parent, but it will also support them in the wider community and in life going forward.
  • When you start to use clear and direct communication can you reflect on how it feels for you?
  • Did you feel safe in the communication?
  • Did you get your message across and achieve what you set out to say to the other person?
  • Was it received well by the other person?

Reflect on how you can practice being assertive in the coming week. At times you may need to write out what you are going to say. You may feel uncomfortable talking in this way, as you have used another style all of your life. If you practice and persist, you will see the benefits and one day you will not need to practice as it will have become naturally part of you.