2019 – Page 7 – One Family Ireland

10 Ways to Parent Through Stressful Times

9 April 2019/in Training /by Comms

Parenting can bring many challenges and when you are stressed these challenges can seem even more difficult to face. Here are some tips on how you can manage your stress levels and teach your children that while it may be unpleasant, stress is a part of everyday life. However, it is also important to show them how to manage stressful situations and to help them develop their emotional strength in order to cope with life’s challenges.

It is vital that parents learn to manage their stress and to develop strategies for dealing with difficult life and relationship issues.
When parents cannot manage their stress this rubs off on children and they can become stressed or depressed.
Learning the importance of support and the strength inherent in being able to ask for help is a skill that will take parents a long way.
Children can also become stressed in their own right so parents can model good stress management for their children.
In order to feel good about ourselves we need others to care about and care for.
Knowing what help is out there in times of stress can bring a real sense of relief.
Each of us needs a support system and this can come in many forms. Family members and even just one close friend can make all the difference to our emotional well being.
Parents with children of similar ages can provide excellent support for each other through the mutual sharing of experiences.
In order to parent well you need to be a good parent to yourself. Minding yourself is the key to keeping your stress levels down.
Keeping a focus on your child’s well being can also have a diminishing effect on your own stress levels.

Find out more about our parenting skills programmes and parent supports. For support and information on these or any related topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie.

Who is looking after the Working Poor?

5 March 2019/in Media, News, Press Releases /by Comms

Who is looking after the Working Poor?

Government inaction on childcare and housing means that work does not pay for many one-parent families

[Dublin, 5 March] One Family, Ireland’s organisation for people parenting alone, sharing parenting and separating said that Government inaction on childcare and housing means that work does not pay for many one-parent families. The statement comes following the publication of a new report from the Society of St Vincent de Paul (SVP), entitled Working, Parenting and Struggling, which found that the rate of in-work poverty among lone parents more than doubled between 2012 and 2017.

CEO of One Family Karen Kiernan said, “Successive Governments have pushed one-parent families off social welfare but have failed to put adequate supports such as income supports, accessible childcare or housing supports in place to make work pay. This new report from SVP adds to the pile of Government-commissioned research and independent research all saying the same thing – the majority of lone-parents and their children are living way below the poverty line and forcing them off social welfare into low-paid precarious employment is not working.”

Ms Kiernan added, “The Indecon report (2017) which examined the impacts of Budget 2012 cuts on lone parents, said 63% of respondents in full-time employment couldn’t afford 3+ items on the deprivation list, meaning that they are experiencing deprivation daily, and in-work poverty. Who is concerned about the fact that they are fulfilling Government policy by working full-time but their children are suffering?

The SVP’s Working, Parenting and Struggling report states that lone parents in Ireland are almost 5 times more likely to experience in-work poverty than other households with children (20.8% compared to 4.2%). Figures that are backed up in the SILC report published in December 2018 which said that individuals living in households where there was one adult with children aged under 18 continue to have the highest consistent poverty rate at 20.7%.

“Work should pay. Budget 2019 included a number of welcome improvements in income supports for one-parents families but more needs to be done. We are calling on Government to introduce targeted educational, employment, childcare and housing supports for the most vulnerable children and parents in our society so that we do not leave another generation behind.”

Notes to editor:

About One Family: One Family was founded in 1972 as Cherish and is Ireland’s organisation for one-parent families and people sharing parenting, or separating.

Available for Interview

Karen Kiernan, CEO | t: 01 662 9212 or 086 850 9191

Further Information/Scheduling

Noel Sweeney, Communications and Events Manager | t: 01 622 9212 or 085 7241294

10 Ways to Survive Sleepless Nights

19 February 2019/in Training /by Comms

With a young child, one of the most trying times can be night time. We all expect to be awake with babies and infants, but what if your child is 3 years of age and still waking you at night? Parents and children need their rest after a long day of work, school, or play, although sleep is often interrupted by a cry for help from another room. As parents, it’s impossible to ignore our children, yet we all need a good night’s sleep and we want the same for our children as well. Not getting enough sleep can affect how we parent and many other aspects of our lives. We explore 10 Ways to Survive Sleepless Nights.

If you know to expect that your child might call you during the night, it’s best to just accept it rather than dread it, as children will pick up on your anxiety.
Try to get to bed yourself very early at least 3 nights a week – even if you don’t really feel like it – so you can get hopefully 4-5 hours of continuous sleep before the first call from your child.
Stay calm during the night. Remember that it’s okay to forget the rules at times. If they will sleep well in your bed take them in, or get into bed with them if you can. A double bed for young children can be great if you have the space; at least you’ll have room then!
Talk with your child during the day about sleeping. Praise them if they sleep well and try to encourage them to call you when it starts to get bright, not when it is dark. Encourage self-soothing such as cuddling up with favourite teddy bears. Be extra generous with praise for any attempt they make to sleep better in their own bed without calling you. Talk to them about how sleep fills them up with energy for the next day and how they need it for the busy day ahead of them. Help them to understand and like the idea of sleeping, and talk with them about why parents need sleep too.
Try to ensure that during the day (not at bedtime), that you talk over things that are happening with them too. All kinds of things can play on your child’s mind that you might not be aware of: new home, new baby, getting in trouble, starting school etc. Dreams can wake them with anxiety.
If you live with another adult take turns to get up to the child – take every second night – then at least you are both getting a good sleep a few nights every week.
What if you have two children waking in the night? If safe to do so, and you have a big bed and side rails – and you have not been drinking alcohol or are impaired in any way – it can be good to take them on a sleepover into your bed on occasion. This could mean you all get to sleep till morning, or at least the early hours.
Try not to focus on how little sleep you get. Remember that a lot of parents are in the same situation. Think about how you might be able to incorporate opportunities for sleep into your own routine. If you travel on public transport, perhaps take a nap on the bus or train; or have one in the morning at home if your child is at creche or school. Explore if anyone can mind your child once a week for a few hours during which you can look forward to some sleep; for example, arranging rotating play dates with another parent.
Build some positives into your day. For example, look forward to some nice breakfast to give yourself a boost to get going. Something like fruit and yoghurt doesn’t have to cost much or take a lot of time to prepare. When we are really tired, we can feel somewhat low, especially if we’re parenting alone without many opportunities to plan for some sleep for ourselves; so it’s very important to actively build in these little positives to our routine.
Support your child to sleep well by following a bedtime routine and providing them with a restful space. What is the room like that they sleep in? Do they like it? Do they have cuddly teddies they have a good bond with during the day? Have they a night light? Is it a calm, secure, peaceful area?

Along with this post, you might like to also read ‘10 Ways to Establish a Bedtime Routine.’

’10 Ways to’ is by One Family’s Director of Children and Parenting Services, Geraldine Kelly.

For support and advice on any of these topics, call askonefamily on lo-call 1890 66 22 12 or email support@onefamily.ie. Find out more about our parenting programmes here.

Image credit: Pixabay

Fun, family friendly, fundraiser at Third Space, Smithfield

5 February 2019/in News, Uncategorized /by Comms

Fun, family friendly, fundraiser at Third Space, Smithfield on Friday February 22 from 7.00pm-9.30pm. Third Space as part of their Square Meal initiative provide all the food for free, the staff work for free, you enjoy a beautiful meal in the company of lovely people and you donate what you think the meal was worth/what you can afford and it all goes to One Family so we can continue to support families most in need. You can BYOB if you want and children are very welcome. You can book directly with Third Space on 01-529-7208 or email office@thirdspace.ie. Thanks for your support!

One Family welcome Government’s decision on Divorce Referendum

29 January 2019/in Media, News, Press Releases /by Comms

Services must now be provided for family law

[Dublin, 29 January] One Family, Ireland’s organisation for people parenting alone, sharing parenting, and those who are separating warmly welcomes the Government’s announcement in relation to the upcoming Divorce Referendum in May.

One Family CEO Karen Kiernan said: “The decision to ask the people to completely remove the waiting time from the wording of the Constitution and deal with it in legislation is the appropriate one. From our work with families separating we know that in most cases four years is too long for people to wait in order to apply for a divorce. The Constitution is not the place for complex and detailed personal issues to be dealt with.

She continued: “We look forward to a modernisation of the divorce legislation in Ireland and we take this opportunity to call on the Government to support people through this difficult process by providing critical services for parents and children who use the family law courts. This is standard across much of the world and we are sadly lagging behind. We are still awaiting publication of the Family Law Courts Bill and the new Dublin Children and Family Courts development in Dublin 7 has unfortunately stalled.”